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My mother-in-law is disabled and will not attend social events- how can I get her to come?

My Mother -in -law misssed the baby's baptisum and the party after cause she did not want help coming up the stairs @ our house or the church. I told her the church had a lift for disabled people and the guys would find a way to get her in our house, even if she had to be carried up the stairs. She uses a walker, she had a stroke a few years ago. Now we are having a 1st birthday for our baby in June & I'm afraid she won't come again and hurt my husbands feelings again. What can we do?
She can walk by holding on to things, but she is afraid to fall.

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pamom222

Asked by pamom222 at 10:35 AM on Apr. 6, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

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Answers (3)
  • You can't make her do anything, she's in a pitty party phase and she is missing out on her grandchild. Someone needs to tell her to pull her head out of her ass and get on with her life
    Zakysmommy

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 10:38 AM on Apr. 6, 2009

  • I agree you can't make her do anything....my MIL has MAJOR issues too. We stopped taking it personally a long time ago. We know we aren't missing anything, but we no longer care if she does miss out on something, that is her choice and she has to live with it. But their is also the option of taking the events to her when possible, having the party at her house, things like that if you really want her there.
    mamatware

    Answer by mamatware at 10:40 AM on Apr. 6, 2009

  • I would worry less about your DH's feelings and more about your MIL. She sounds like she might be depressed due to her recent situation. I think you should encourage her to see a doctor and discuss the possibility of depression. Many people of older generations have a hard time talking about things like that to anyone, even a doctor, because it comes across as a sign of weakness in their eyes. Take some time and get her mentally healthy, then she'll be at all your events. :)
    texassahm

    Answer by texassahm at 11:17 AM on Apr. 6, 2009

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