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How would you feel???

my fiance's mother never calls to see how me or my two boys are doing, ever, the whole 5 years that he and I have been together. We are going through a custody battle right now with his ex girlfriend concerning their 7 year old daughter. Aside from the fact that she always favored his daughter in front of my boys, now she is going behind his back and talking with the ex and having her grandaughter come to her house knowing very well that the ex is not allowing her own son to see his own daughter. she does this and tells him after she gets her grandaughter. She talks to the ex behind our back and thinks its ok to do this, yet claims that she hates her and she is a bad mom and yelled at my fiance for years to get an attorney that she would back us up.. Now that we have an attorney, she has been talking the ex about everything. She has made me and my children feel like the outsider and the ex a part of the family.

Answer Question
 
burnic43

Asked by burnic43 at 10:57 AM on Apr. 7, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • I hate when other people have to but in a ruin your buisness. She needs to get a life, respect you both as parents and stop with the shady attitude. She need to stop the drama
    NicholeAT

    Answer by NicholeAT at 11:04 AM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • maybe she feels she has to do that in order to see her grandaughter.

    Maybe she will be more accepting of you when you are married to her son?

    Have you told her how you feel about her treatment? have you talked to her fiance about it? He is really the one who should be setting his mom straight about it. He needs to be standing up for you and protecting you.

    and if he is and he does- then you need to just try to ignore her behavior and rest assured in the love, support of your man.
    Kiter

    Answer by Kiter at 11:06 AM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • I would have a very long talk with my fiance and possibly his mother. If she is like this now, what is she going to be like when you get married? I would not want to be around this woman at all, especially if she is going to show favortism toward his daughter. I don't handle favortism to one particular child very well, especially if children's feelings are going to be hurt. This woman appears to be very two-faced and I would not trust her. She is wrong.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:11 AM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • She is aware how I feel. He is aware how I feel. This has been going on too long and its really pushing me away!!!
    burnic43

    Answer by burnic43 at 11:19 AM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • Does he stand up for you? Does he tell his mom he doesn't want it and won't allow his finace/wife to be treated like that and if she continues then she can't be a part of his new life? Or does he know how you feel and sit back and allow it?

    You really only have 2 choices-
    do something drastic about it and take a stand .
    or do nothing about it and find a way to cope. Go on with your life and loving your husband/kids despite her.

    Kiter

    Answer by Kiter at 11:34 AM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • Run, it only gets worse. She will forever be chasing his daughter and reminding you that your not her grandchilds mother.
    poohmom85

    Answer by poohmom85 at 12:09 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • You can't run!!! I am in a similar situation. My boyfriends ex has custody of their son (we are trying to get custody as well) and will not let my bf see him right now. My bf's father i feel always ignores me and makes me feel like he likes the ex better than me. Also, my bf's mom is always calling the ex and being nice and kissing her butt but then says she hates her when I'm there. The things is though, I finally realized that they only reason they are sucking up to her is b/c they still want to be able to see their grandson! If they start going against her as well then she will not only keep him from my bf but from his parents too and that's not fair. Probably once the custody thing is over it will get better, then if you guys win (and if we win,lol) the "in-laws" will come around and finally not have to kiss the ex's butt to get to see their grandchild. Stick it out! Good Luck!!!
    BFickenscher

    Answer by BFickenscher at 12:41 PM on Apr. 8, 2009

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