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The word "SEX" and 7 yr. old--HELP!

Our 7 yr. old daughter, who is a very smart & inquisitive child, popped up one day & stated something about "sex". We both just froze & were stunned. We calmly asked her if she knew what the word meant & she said no. I explained to her that it means if you are a boy or girl. I am all about discussing that subject with her, but not at this young of age, plus she said she had no clue what she was saying. Then yesterday we were watching something on TV, & this woman picked up her cell phone & showed a video of her & a man being intimate. It was a TV show, so it wasn't in detail, but our daughter asked us, "Was that the woman & man having sex?" We both again were shocked. We explained to her that the lady was rubbing the man's back, & she was ok with that. Then on the darn radio this morning, the DJ was doing the news & mentioned someone "having sex" & I quickly turned it off. What do I do or say? I'm so lost!!!


Asked by Anonymous at 11:13 AM on Apr. 7, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • You're going to have to tell her... you don't have to go into detail about conception or the mechanics, just that its something a man and woman do when they love each other. Tell her that it isn't "naughty" but that it is not appropriate for her to say. If she has questions, answer them. If there is something that makes you uncomfortable, or that you want to check with dad before giving her an answer, tell her you don't know but you will tell her later. Talk to dad and then answer her questions.

    I got the sex talk when I was 4 when my sister was born. It didn't traumatize me or make me promiscuous when I was older. When I got to sixth grade sex ed, I just didn't learn anything new.

    Answer by Crystal1124 at 11:28 AM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • If she is asking...then you need to tell her something. It's better you tell her now than her getting some messed up explination by her friends. You don't need to go into detail about it at her age. Tell her it's something done between a man and a woman who love eachother very much and it's a grown up thing to do...As she gets older you can divulge more info. The more open you are with her the better.

    Answer by happyathomemum at 11:16 AM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • Maybe you should tell her what sex is. When I was that age my parent's told me and I stopped asking questions.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:18 AM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • Well, mom, like it or not, it's time to have a little sex talk. You can't avoid it forever, and even though you think she's too young, it's time. My son just turned 8, and we've had to have a little talk. You don't have to give her details. I told my son that sex was something that adult men and women do to show love and to make babies, after they are married. That was all he wanted to know. If you keep avoiding it, turning the radio off and lying about what she sees, all you're going to do is make her more curious, and eventually, when she catches on to you lying about what she sees, it could erode her trust in you. As she gets older, then you can get more detailed as to birth control, before and after marriage, your values, etc. But right now, I think you need to accept that whether you want to or not, her curiousity is forcing your hand, and you need to talk to her. Good luck!

    Answer by tropicalmama at 11:20 AM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • My son just turned 8 and he knows all the details and I explained that he should wait until marriage. Kid know these things younger and younger and if she does not get the truth from you, she will get lies elsewhere.

    Answer by kemclaughlin at 11:24 AM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • Thanks. I have no problem with discussing this with her. I'm a nurse and started discussing menstrual cycles and body changes with her when she was 2 because she asked. I'm not trying to hide information or lie to her. I just didn't know if 7 was too young. Spring Break is coming up for her school district, so I think I'll check out some movies or books on this subject to give her a visual idea of what happens, and sit down with her during Spring Break. NOT visual ideas of sex, but something that can help her better understand how babies develop. I'm in my last 9 weeks of pregnancy, and when she first found out I was pregnant, she was kinda confused about how the baby got I will sit down with her and start having a talk with her at her age level though. I'm not going to go into deep dark details. Thanks for the comments!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:30 AM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • I think she might need to learn some of the mechanics as far as female stuff with it. Not just "married men and women do it" She seems a little too smart for that to suffice.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 11:31 AM on Apr. 7, 2009