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Do I have the right to request this?

Ok so my child's father has always just brought me formula, diapers, wipes etc for my son but has never actually given me money. I want him to just give me the money so I can go buy the supplies for my son, put money in the bank for him, and quite frankly if things get tight buy groceries with some of the money he gives me. He doesnt want to. He just wants to continue buying me supplies yet not give me any money. I want him to realize that a box of 500 diapers isnt going to sit in a bank and collect interest and save up when he gets older and needs daycare. Do I have a right to just request that he gives me money rather than supplies?

(And please not that we are in the court proceedings to establish child support but its taking an extremely long time)

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:11 PM on Apr. 7, 2009 in Money & Work

Answers (4)
  • Does he pay child support? If not, you need to start the paperwork.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:17 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • Child support is meant to pay for things like diapers, wipes, formula, etc. So by him just buying that for you, I think it should be fine until the court gives direct orders on what to do. Just take the money you are saving from him buying those supplies and put that money in the bank. You need that stuff anyway so it shouldn't matter which one of you is buying them.

    Answer by DDry at 12:20 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • You can ask, but you can't MAKE him except by getting court ordered child support. That's the only way that you can be assured of getting the cash to use as you see fit to provide for your son. I'd ask, but I'd put it very nicely and explain it the way you do here: That you are thinking ahead to the future and how he can best help provide for your son.

    Answer by tropicalmama at 12:20 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • Is he insisting on buying everything instead of giving you the money? In doing so he may just be cutting off his nose to spite his face because if he were giving you the money even without a court order and you were acknowledging that he did by providing him with a receipt each month, then he could use that to show the court that he has been paying support. Some courts will take this into consideration and some courts won't. So, when the court does order support, its going to go back to either the date of the child's birth or the date the motion was filed to determine arrearages. They are going to make him pay what he would have owed. If he could prove that he paid you during that time then the court may deduct those payments from arrearage. The cost of the things he has purchased will not be considered. Those things the Court looks at as gifts.

    Answer by Msaural at 12:35 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

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