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Rights for Birthmothers?

I'm curious to know how others feel about these latest findings released by the Evan B. Donaldson Institute . . .


Asked by Anonymous at 1:10 PM on Apr. 7, 2009 in Adoption

This question is closed.
Answers (69)
  • Aparents are not kidnapping pregnant women off the streets, these women made an adoption plan.

    First off, where is the word kidnapping used here? and why is there always this need to insert exaggerated words like "kidnapping and stealing" where neither word was used to begin with.

    Secondly, expectant mothers ARE approached everywhere: at work, supermarkets, malls, churches, doctors offices, schools, etc.., with adoption hype. They ARE solicited to with lures like: Pregnant? don't know where to turn? we can help you for FREE, contact us. Or Please consider us, we can help each other, talk with my lawyer or with my agency. The expectant mother is a symbol of potential means to the newborn adoption industry and the desperately wantin' a newborn. The two work in tandem with each other, and a truly unholy alliance against mother and child if there ever was one.


    Answer by Anonymous at 8:41 PM on Apr. 18, 2009

  • I agree...I also feel that adopting parents should have counceling.

    Answer by Dannee at 1:21 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • That is an awesome article! No one offered counseling to me when I was going through giving my child up for adoption, but I guess thats b/c they probably could tell that with counseling I probably wouldn't have done it.

    Answer by mikeyjavimami21 at 1:51 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • Great article. I partly agree with AAKeeley in that they absolutely should be legally enforceable, and subject change by the court, but I think every couple of years is unnecessary. If an open adoption is working why bog down the courts. I think either side should be able to go back to renegotiate their position if they feel the need but not otherwise.


    Answer by onethentwins at 3:44 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • On reading it a second time: I don't care for this article using the term birth mother for pregnant women considering adoption. Very bad form, especially considering the source. I think these women's right #1 should be the truth. They know adoption isn't good for them or their babies, all they care about is making money. Which comes to the next right #2 Nobody should be able to profit from separating a child from it's mother.

    Answer by onethentwins at 4:33 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • The amount of post-adoption support provided to both birth moms (birth family), adoptive families, and adoptees is deplorable. I know that some agencies do a good job but by large, once an adoption is finalized all members of the triad are kind of left to "figure it out themselves". And, when any triad member feels a need for support and seeks support, the seem to be treated as though they just aren't "adjusting well" or "accepting the new reality of adoption".

    The truth is that life is complex - adoption can be complex - and we all need support at times. Right now people seem to get referred to clinical counseling when they are in crisis (which is appropriate) but what about when you just need a little support and insight into where you are with your adoption journey. What about when it's not a crisis per se but just an area related to adoption that you'd like to improve upon?

    Answer by PortAngeles1969 at 1:27 AM on Apr. 8, 2009

  • This report was released in Nov, 2006.

    Evan B. Donaldson Institute claims this report represents the most thorough, intensive, comprehensive, sophisticated effort. They state there are faulty stereotypes and misconceptions about mothers of adoption loss because there's no knowledge of who they are.  So they've taken their findings and make recommendations. 
    Well FYI - NOT ONE mother of adoption loss was interviewed for this 68 page report. That's right - NOT ONE. And it's not because they didn't know where to contact mothers if they really wanted to. Yet,  here they are, telling you and John Q. Public all about mothers - typical self-appointed experts of the infant adoption industry, taking it upon themselves, out to set the record straight and making recommendations.  Well enough and no more !!!  mothers can speak for themselves.



    Answer by Anonymous at 3:37 AM on Apr. 8, 2009

  • i agree with allaboutkeely. There was a case of a woman murdering her adopted daughter because of bonding issues.She literally felt like the child hated her and in return didn't like the child. If I remember the story correctly, I think she asked for help (cant remember where) but to no i think counseling should be mandatory on aps and always available fr bps at any time.

    Answer by babycakes254 at 10:48 AM on Apr. 8, 2009

  • Peggy Sue Hilt is the name, daughter was adopted from Russia (Nina Hilt),she punched and kicked her ,and she died a while after.. google it, its all over. Sorry didn't mean to hijack, but aps need counseling as well!

    Answer by babycakes254 at 10:56 AM on Apr. 8, 2009

  • "Well FYI - NOT ONE mother of adoption loss was interviewed for this 68 page report. " I'm not sure if it was as long ago as 2006, but I know I filled out a detailed survey on birth mother feelings for this institute. I also posted it in the adoption groups for other mothers to complete.

    Answer by onethentwins at 11:27 AM on Apr. 8, 2009