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Is this ok, when we have baby #2 to have my husband go home at night...

with our son and then come back first thing in the morning? We have a two year old but he will be three by the time baby will be here and we dont trust any one to stay with him. No family or freinds that we 100% trust so I have to put my child first cause even though Im going to be a little lonely at night while Im there by myself I know that my son will be home sleeping with my husband and not staying with someone else. He plans on brining our son back in the mornings and staying till visiting hrs over for the 2 days Im in there. With our son I kept him in the room all the time with me unless the nurses needed to take him for a bit but I cant do that this time cause my husband wont be there to help me. So I figured I would take advantage of our newborn being in the nursury so I can get some sleep this time round. Would you do it this way if you had no one to help? I feel like Im taking away from my husband cause he cant bond

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:45 PM on Apr. 7, 2009 in Pregnancy

Answers (14)
  • OP... as much with the newborn as he did with our two year old when he was born.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:46 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • Yes i would
    heather.darin

    Answer by heather.darin at 4:46 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • I'm planning on having my husband take my daughter home at night and do her regular routine when we have our second. I feel like we owe it to her to keep her schedule since there will be this new baby taking up a lot of everyones time & a lot of her attention!!!
    prettylilrae

    Answer by prettylilrae at 4:48 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • It sounds like a plan to me. Dh will get time to bond with the new baby. And this way it seems like your first son is getting special time with daddy. It may help him with his adjustment.

    you do what you gotta do sometimes. ;) I understand about not having family you trust. My MIL watched my 2 year old son when I went to have my second. While I was in labor my SIL called and my first child was screaming. She then told me that MIL had a dentist appointment and let SIL watch my son and she didnt know what to do b/c he was screaming.

    I was MAD as crap. I was in LABOR!!!! She's done unreliable things like that ever since I have known her so now, I dont trust her anymore.
    mom2twobabes

    Answer by mom2twobabes at 4:50 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • My husband will be going home w/ our 4 yr old everynight. He will be up most of the day, but will be leaving to drop him off at grandparents house or something. There is no way my son will be able to sit at the hospital for the entire day.
    Tiffany237

    Answer by Tiffany237 at 4:51 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • We did this when my daughter was born. The first night, my mom stayed with our 6 year old, but my son stayed upset the whole night....even tho we thought we had prepared him enough. Since I had had a C-Section, my doc wanted me to stay for 3 nights. So the next 2 nights, we let the nursery take the baby and my husband went home and stayed with our son. The nursery would bring me my daughter when it was time to nurse her and then take her back when she was done. I got some sleep, and my son was much more comfy with daddy at home (even tho he loves his nana).

    momjoy1027

    Answer by momjoy1027 at 4:51 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • when I had my second baby I had a friend (I trusted though) and she watched my DD why hubby was in the room with me when I had the baby then my girlfriend brought my DD up to see me when I had the baby I wouldn't let anyone hold the new baby until she got to hold her. I wanted her to be the first to hold her new sister. But I didn't trust anyone to watch my DD over night. She was 3 months away from being 3. I had my hubby take her home with him. He stayed there with me with baby number 1 but not 2 because we had another child too so it isn't wrong if he goes home at night.
    mommy5409

    Answer by mommy5409 at 4:54 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • oh ya I also had him only come for visiting hours and then when visiting hours were over he went home because it was to much for her to sit there all day. Sometimes he had to leave before visiting hours were over.
    mommy5409

    Answer by mommy5409 at 4:57 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • It sounds good as long as you're comfortable with it. I am expecting a second child and my son who will be two is going to stay at the hospital with us at night and my mom and brother and sisters are going to have him all day. I know that this may sound strange but my mom did it when she had one that was 2 and a newborn and it worked better for her that way. I would do what would cause you the least amount of stress since that is what will be best for you the new baby and your family
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:39 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • If that is what works for ya'll, then do it. It will give both of you peace of mind to know your son is being taken care of properly. I understand that your DH won't be there at night, but he'll be there in the day time, so he'll have a chance to bond. Don't worry, mama, you're doing fine!
    kbates1208

    Answer by kbates1208 at 5:49 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

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