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Am I over thinking things?

Every day I think about things that I could do to better myself, as a mother, wife, daughter, friends and just as a human to have a happier life. Well sometimes I think, read and write so much that I get tired of thinking and trying to do everything that I put out to do for myself that day. That at the end of the day I get frustrated with myself because nothing goes according to my plan. Kids misbehave and husband yells and I end up eating and over eating and things seem to feel better and then I hate myself for binge eating and hurt myself with mean words and feelings. Its a an going cycle that I can't seem to break from. Any ideas I am open to anything about now. Thanks ladies.

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Lena240

Asked by Lena240 at 6:13 PM on Apr. 7, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (7)
  • it sounds like you are in a cycle of guilt. if there are things in your life you can change, by all means now is the time to begin to change them. if these things are un changeable, you need to make your peace with them.
    when you find yourself thinking, reading and writing about the things in your life you are not happy with, take that a the sign to STOP! get up and take a walk, go and make a cup of tea, go and brush your hair, anything to stop the thought from spiraling down into depression. try for one positive change per day. if you feel bad you are not spending quality time with the kids, write an evening routine, making time for a story or chat with them before bed. do you best to stick to the routine, as it will also give you much needed order. stick with it!
    katiemum

    Answer by katiemum at 6:25 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • yeah, over thinking. My SO says I do that so i've tried to stop. Since I've tried to stop I have stopped having headaches! Go figure
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:57 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • This is a job for Costanza's Law of Opposites! You simply do the opposite of what you have been doing. Instead of thinking and writing, act! Get up and do those things. That will break that cycle and get you going in a positive direction.
    Fistandantalus

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 7:16 PM on Apr. 7, 2009

  • that is all true I am all about I need to do this and change that but nothing gets done all I end up doing is feeling overwhelmed lately I take it out on my kids and husband.. Thank you
    Lena240

    Answer by Lena240 at 8:39 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • Make simpler goals. i.e. -Today, I will ignore the phone for an hour and spend it with my family. Don't force them to spend time with you, but let them know you're available. Or, making sure you ask about your family's day and making sure you listen. My favorite goal for a day was to say one nice thing for every bad thing I thought. That was difficult but fun.

    I tend to over think, read, write, etc and get overwhelmed. People think I'm crazy when I say I'm annoyed with the sound of my own voice, but that's partially why - because I overdue it.

    You are definitely being too hard on yourself. You should definitely make smaller goals, and be easy on yourself. Its hard ignoring everyone else bringing you down, but even harder when you're doing it to yourself. (so saying one nice thing for every mean thing, would also include yourself - ;). )

    Another suggestion is to take some time out of your day for QUIET TIME. 10-30min
    KnLzMom

    Answer by KnLzMom at 1:56 PM on Apr. 10, 2009

  • Use QUIET TIME to refocus, refresh, and take focus off of most things around you. i.e. talking to God; bath by candle light; meditation; drinking some tea or coffee outside in the sun or under the stars; reading a book (encouraging and soothing -sometimes the bible does this for me...); google some relaxation techniques - there are plenty you can do while you're working (they're subtle), while you're cooking, while you're listening to yelling or whining.... :), etc.

    Hope it helps.
    KnLzMom

    Answer by KnLzMom at 2:00 PM on Apr. 10, 2009

  • Sorry, I know this a lot to read, someone said something about headaches, and it made me think of all-natural stuff to cure that - white willow - found in health stores. There are things like that, natural herb supplements, that can help with relaxation too.
    KnLzMom

    Answer by KnLzMom at 2:02 PM on Apr. 10, 2009

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