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Speaking in front of a group? (fear)

My sister is getting married in a year and I'll be her Matron of Honor. I have a huge fear of speaking to groups and I'm scared to death about the toast! I'm already panicking over what I will say and about all those eyes that will be watching me, AHHH! She's also having her wedding taped so I can't mess up, lol.

Has anyone else who has a fear of speaking in front of people done it? How did you get over the fear and anxiety? Picturing everyone in their underwear won't help, LOL!


Asked by ReneeK3 at 11:46 AM on Apr. 8, 2009 in Health

Level 2 (9 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (3)
  • Great tips from 2-1CavWife. As a public speaker I can tell you that we still have fear of saying the right thing at the right time. I still get butterflies and want to not go on. The best thing you can do is step through that fear and let it know you are in charge not it!

    Since you are planning this way ahead then start practicing now. Look in the mirror and watch yourself do the toast. You can also record yourself doing the toast and watch it to see how you are on the recording.

    Show people you are confident even if you are afraid. Stand tall, head up and eyes making contact with people or a person (sister). And no one will know you are scared.

    You can also find a group in your area called "Toastmasters" and attend their meetings. They help you get past the challenges and you can practice and see other people getting past their fear of public speaking too.

    I am sure you will be great! Keep looking past the fear!

    Answer by LegacyKimberley at 12:11 PM on Apr. 8, 2009

  • Well the first thing is that just because it is being taped doesn't mean that you have to do it perfect, if anything you miss a word or say something funny by mistake, it will ender you on the tape. :) It is alright to make a mistake, dont feel like you have to be perfect, just be prepared. Make sure that you have practiced your speech over and over again, and right it on a card and keep it in your hand just incase you get stage fright and forget. Everything is written on the card so you dont have to worry about standing there looking confused or lost. Also for the toast it might help if you face your sister and talk to her, instead of an entire audience. You are talking to her and her new husband directly, and that way you can just tune out the crowd. Good luck, I am sure you will do great!

    Answer by 2-1CavWife at 11:51 AM on Apr. 8, 2009

  • I haven't really had to do much public speaking. I was in a friend's wedding though and had to read some scripture. I was nervous enough as it was, but then fell and dislocated my shoulder (and it popped back in when I landed, serious pain) right before I was supposed to read. Miraculously I pulled it together and still got up to read with no one the wiser until after the fact. (except for the people who came to pick me up off the stairs when I fell).
    Come up with a "speech" that is simple and to the point if you don't feel like you can do anything too eloquent. Just tell your sister and BIL that you love them, how beautiful their special day was, and that you wish them the best, and maybe throw in a bit of advice that you feel is important for a happy marriage. It doesn't have to be a ten minutes speech to be special.

    Answer by KTMOM at 12:38 PM on Apr. 8, 2009