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My little son is about to start preschool. I have this humongous fear of mean kids picking on him or not sharing or basically anything being done or said to him to effect his well being and self esteem... What do you do to make sure your kids are safe at school?

 
smilingontime

Asked by smilingontime at 2:16 PM on Jun. 20, 2008 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 4 (57 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • This is so hard, moving our kids into the "real world" But, as we all know, this time comes sooner or later. Unfortunately, kids now days, are sometimes really mean even in preschool. My little girl is moving to preschool in the fall.

    For, me, as a parent, and her mother, building a strong sense of self is what is going to be very important. Making sure that she is always confindent, and true to who she is is really important. Surrounding her with lot's of love and positivity is really all you can do.

    But, if she feels good about who she is, then it won't be as hard, for her when she discover's the sometimes, "cruel world".

    Hope I helped!
    goldie0405

    Answer by goldie0405 at 2:49 PM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • my daughter just finished preschool. there were "mean girls" in her class. almost everyday she would come home and tell me they were mean to her. it shocks me that 4 and 5 year olds even know how to be mean to another child, but it happens. i spoke to the teacher who answered "i have never seen any of that going on" I know my kid wasn't lying. i had seen it myself a few times. they were quite frankly, little brats to her. i don't think you can really do anything to stop it from happening, it just does. i just kept telling my daughter don't pay any attention to them. you are better than that. if they are mean to you just be nice to them. kill them with kindness. and she's fine. she eventually made friends with other kids that the "mean girls" were mean to. i also think its just the girls you have to worry about. Boys are so much more laid back and they don't have time to pick on anybody. they'd rather just be friends and play.
    MommyHaney

    Answer by MommyHaney at 2:24 PM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • THERE IS NOTHING THAT YOU CAN DO ABOUT THAT, BUT AS A MOTHER I UNDERSTAND BUT YOU HAVE TO LET YOUR CHILD FIND HIS/HER OWN WAY THE ONLY THING YOU CAN DO IS MAKE SURE THAT THE PRESCHOOL THAT YOUR CHILD IS GOING TO IS A SAFE ENVIORNMENT.
    kari01

    Answer by kari01 at 2:42 PM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • Visit the preschool! Giving your son short previews of a new situation will help him get acquainted before total immersion. He'll know where things are, the smells and sounds, etc. Plan on 2 hrs for the 1st visit. Stay w/ him for the 1st 15 minutes then-and this is important-LEAVE.
    Observe through the window; ask the director how. (don’t want him seeing you watching) Stay a little while, then LEAVE THE BUILDING. :-) Make yourself; plan some short errand. When you return, observe for a short time. My pre-sch has film on the window that, when the hall lights are off & the door is closed, lets parents view in, but the kids can't see out. This routine has helped my DDs get to know a place & the kids. Our 1st visit was 2 hrs, the second was 4 hrs. The new school did NOT charge for this time.
    Mean people suck, no matter their size. If he’s familiar w/ the place he’ll do fine. You both will!
    KimberHM1

    Answer by KimberHM1 at 2:48 PM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • Do not instill your fears in him whatever you do. He should not be set up to be worried about it.
    lynn63042

    Answer by lynn63042 at 3:19 PM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • I was a preschool teacher at several different schools in the three year old class. I know you are worried about him, but Lynn is right when she says dont instill your fears in him. That will make him fearful as well. You need to remain positive about it. You'd be surprised how much having positive energy really will work. Don't worry, your son will be fine. Make sure you've met the teacher and like the way she does things. We encouraged the children to be sweet to one another and chances are there will be another child in the class that he will play well with. They almost always do. I think you being worried is natural, but I think your son will love it once he gets used to it! Hope this helps!
    lowencope

    Answer by lowencope at 4:05 PM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • I don't think there is a lot you can do about other kids. Just make sure you tell your son things to build his self esteem and help him cope when other kids say things that may be mean. It is just one of those things in life where you have to let go of the control and be there for back up support. Congrats... he is growing up fast. I am just worried about what comes next!!! :c)
    TurksMommy

    Answer by TurksMommy at 6:56 PM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • You just need to give him to the tools needed to protect himself, to know what to say to a kid who takes something away, teases him or uses mean words. All kids get picked on at some point so providing the tools necessary to counteract some of the teasing is the best gift you can give your child. It still won't be easy, but your son may feel more empowered knowing he handled the situation well. Above all, be sure you set him up for a wonderful school experience. So many things roll off kids' backs...we the parents are far more affected than the kids many times:) GOod luck with this milestone:)
    campeno

    Answer by campeno at 10:54 AM on Jun. 21, 2008

  • HONESTLY THAT DAY IS FAST APPROACHING FOR ME AND IM NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO IT BUT AS HARSH AS THIS SOUNDS BUT THE BULLYING IS ACTUSLLY GOOD FOR HER IT TEACHES HER HOW TO HANDLE HERSELF ALONE AND HOW TO APPROACH THE SITUATION WITHOUT MOMMY AND DADDY AROUND AND SLOWLY TEACHES HER HOW DIFFERENT OTHER PEOPLE ARE THAN WHAT SHE SEES AT HOME.ITS A LIFE LEARNING LESSON AND I KNOW U FEEL LIKE WHIPPING THEM KIDS A** FOR BEING LIKE THAT BUT ITS JUST A STAGE THERE ALWAYS GONNA BULLYS SHES GOTTA LEARN HOW TO DEFEND HERSELF AND HANDLE IT MOMMY AND DADDY CANT ALWAYS BE AROUND.JUST BE THERE FOR HER EXPLAIN TO HER THAT THERES MEAN PEOPLE AND NICE PEOPLE AND JUST BECAUSE THEY TREAT HER LIKE THAT DONT MEAN THERES ANYTHING WRONG WITH HER.
    ShYmAmA08

    Answer by ShYmAmA08 at 9:26 PM on Jun. 22, 2008

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