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is there anybody out there goiing through what im goiin through????

im due april 28th with my son.
i have been living with the babys father for a year and ever seance ive been pregnant, ive been finding numbers in his phone. he says shit to bitches on mysapce/facebook/crush spot. everytime i call one of the gurls numbers in his phone they all tell me the excat same thing. " why dont you ask him"... And i do but i know he lies to me. i love him so much with all my heart. i couldnt picture myself without him. I just dont know what to do anymore. things are gettin to be to stressfull for me & everytime i confrount him he trys to trun shit around on me. im so confsued right now because i cant stand the fact of being a single mother. i dont want to raise my son on my own....

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sammiiebabiie

Asked by sammiiebabiie at 12:18 PM on Apr. 9, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • You have to ask yourself this question...would you rather raise your son on your own until you find a guy who actually cares about you and loves you and will love your son as his own? Or do you want to stay with a man who...I'm sorry...is clearly hiding something, can't be trusted, stresses you out, and makes you unhappy? No one wants to be a single mother dear, but no one wants to be in a bad relationship where they are being cheated on either. It tells a lot about a man when his girlfriend is pregnant with HIS SON, and he is going out doing God knows what with other women. If my fiance would do this time me in the time that I needed him the most and would hurt me like this AND HIS FUTURE SON, there is no fear in the world that would make me stay with him.
    Ash9724

    Answer by Ash9724 at 12:27 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • sthu anon, and I agree with Ash GL girl
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:29 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • Oh sweetie, he's totally cheating on you! I'm sorry, but it's probably a good idea to face the facts of reality instead of wishing and hoping for something that isn't really there. A lot of moms are single moms, and you can do this with or without him.
    christyg

    Answer by christyg at 12:30 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • I have been where you are now, I finally divorce my ex because I couldn't take it anymore. I know how hard it is to raise a child by yourself, I am raising three teenagers right now. They don't see their father anymore. I was lucky and still am to have my family to be there for me. Financially you can do it, there are a lot of state finance that does help single moms. Good luck
    lily7

    Answer by lily7 at 12:40 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • Okay...it's obvious he could not care less about you or his child: HE DOES NOT WANT TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU. (I'm hoping that the "yelling" will get through your denial and desperation to be with a scumbag).

    Look at it this way - at this point, it doesn't matter what YOU want. Now that you are having a child, it should be ALL ABOUT THE CHILD. You have to consider what is best for YOUR SON!

    You KNOW what you need to do, but are you strong enough to do it?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:46 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • Sorry but if I feel I got to call numbers and check up on him, then things are never going to work out.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:10 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • You have to put your child first. He is obviously cheating on you and doesn't care for you to do such a thing. Why would you want to be with someone so heartless?? Move on. It's for the better, and soon you will look back and thank yourself for getting out sooner than later.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:12 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • First, you've got to love yourself...once you begin loving yourself and knowing what you will take and wont take from a man or anyone else for that matter, you wont wind up back in the same position again...Being a single mother isn't the end of the world and infact being a single mother equips you with strength you never knew you had...
    treasured_hope

    Answer by treasured_hope at 1:57 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • Maybe this can help(Cause YOU & you alone are the only one that can make up your mind to stay or go) When things like this started happing to me while I was pre. with our 2 child. These are a few things I could look back & see later but not at the time.So prehaps you could sit back & look at a bigger pic.{ he started telling me HE was hanging out with friends(witch he didn't do much of before)Telling me he was doing over time at work.(I would call & they couldn't find him at work)Any one on one face talking STOPPED,every little thing became a BIG thing. he would check his clothes more making sure to wear nicer, cleaner clothes when I got to the point that I knew somthing was up&ask he what was wrong he too would turn things are as if i was the one doing or hiding somthing. It got to the point that I got Very depressed &began to think that perhaps he was right it was me. Your happiness is love that will flow over to your son!
    Shaqbe4u

    Answer by Shaqbe4u at 2:06 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • I know you don't want to hear this, but it's probably time to leave and allow him space to grow up.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:17 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

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