Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What the hell kind of marriage....

this guy I know told me him and his wife haven't slept in the same bed together or have had sex for 2 years.. yah he's my friend but I guess he wanted more, like sex, but no way, I'm not having it.
They won't let their son, 3, sleep by himself.. someone is sitting by him when he takes a nap and he co-sleeps with one of them at night.. so overprotective and weird. I told him to give the kid some indepence so he doesn't turn out to be scared of everything!! I just don't know how two people that hardly ever talk to eachother and have no physical relationship still work it out. Anyone else in a rut like him? Any advice I should shell out?


Asked by Anonymous at 2:02 PM on Apr. 9, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • the kids i babysit, their parents are kinda like that. the kis is 3 and this kid sleeps with him prnts every night he has a baad temper and always gets his way and yells and screams when he doesnt and end up getting his way.. weird

    Answer by NewLady1 at 2:18 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • You can tell him that even if his marriage survives until that child leaves home, it's still down the tubes, because there won't be any way to make up all the time that's been lost. You can also tell him that children are not supposed to be a higher priority than is the spouse. We start out alone together and we end up alone together. The time in between should be spent learning how to cherish one another.

    Answer by NannyB. at 2:19 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • Some people are like that. If they are happy with their arrangement, it's not anyone's place to judge it. The parents of a friend of ours has a marriage like that. They have two different bedrooms and always have. Our friend is 30 and can't remember a time when they slept in the same room. They have been married close to 40 years and are happy. It works for them. They haven't had sex in over 10 years. If they aren't happy with what's going on, then they need to be the ones to change it and seek professional help. My husband is a crazy sleeper and our son has recently started getting in bed with us in the middle of the night. My husband waits until he falls back asleep between us and then he goes and gets on the couch so he doesn't smash our son. (We had a close call once so now he is scared of hurting him.) It's not our place to judge other marriages.

    Answer by DDry at 2:20 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • Maybe they LIKE how they are doing things. Maybe the way the are with each other work for what they need and/or want.

    While its ok to have different ideas on family and parenting (cause I know I certainly don't agree with some of my friends or family on lots of issues), you shouldn't be trying to regulate your friend or his marriage and parenting skills.

    And maybe he was feeding you a big line of bull--- in order to sleep with you and wifey has no idea anything is wrong in the marriage and has in fact, put out in 2 years? Some men will tell lies to get what they want....

    You never really know what goes on behind closed doors...

    Answer by ozarkgirl3 at 2:21 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • My fiance did not share the same bed with his X wife for
    FOUR years..............FOUR years...
    Two people like you described do not
    work out..
    the stay for the wrong reasons..

    Answer by Dannee at 2:32 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • stay out of it. They have to work it out on their own. I have a friend who sleeps in the same bed with his wife every night but says he hates her so bad he wouldn't touch her with a glove. He says he stays bc he'd be broke if he left. I have a sister who sleeps with her husband but they have not touched in years and both are seemingly content with it. I don't get it myself but sometimes companionship over ranks sex I guess.

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:32 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • What makes you think he is telling you the truth?

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:07 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • Hah, I don't know if he is telling the truth....... but I guess guys WOULD like about anything to get some ass.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:37 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • My daughter's father's people were like that. Parents slept in different rooms. He tried that shit with me. I told him, it wasn't working for me. That, along with alot of other stuff ended our relationship.

    His brothers' and sisters also slept separately from their partners, and all of their relationships have ended or are in trouble.

    Answer by DivaNCali at 8:34 PM on Apr. 9, 2009