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My husband has the ugliest wife in the world....

I tried shopping for clothes for the second time today since my son was born 6 weeks ago and for the second time came home empty handed. I am so depressed now. I thought I was starting to look okay but both shopping experiences proved me wrong. I just want to crawl in a hole and die. Anyone else feeling super depressed? My husband keeps trying to reassure me that I am "beautiful"...but I think if I were I would know it. And yes yes I know, just take the compliment men dont like insecure women blah blah blah but this isnt like me so no "relationship advice" Just need a pick me up from someone who understands

 
LovinEveryDay

Asked by LovinEveryDay at 2:23 PM on Apr. 9, 2009 in Diet & Fitness

Level 1 (3 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (17)
  • i feel the same way when i go shopping for clothes. i am a plus size woman. either nothing fits or it doesnt look right. so i know exactly what you are going through. it can be a struggle.
    mcoche08

    Answer by mcoche08 at 2:23 PM on Apr. 10, 2009

  • honey we all feel that way after we have a baby. or even before we have a baby. just remember that it took you 9 months to put that baby weight on it doesn't just magically go away after you have the baby.
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 2:28 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • I know the feeling. I had a c-section so trying to find things that fit and trying to find things that wouldn't bother my "wound" was a hard thing to do. Even if you are at your original weight, most of the time, your body is still very different. You lose a lot of muscle while pregnant and muscle weighs more than fat. It's only been 6 weeks, you have PLENTY of time. I bought a lot of skirts with elastic waists for work. With a long shirt, you couldn't tell it was an elastic waist. Try shirt that are more fitted up top around your shoulders and breasts but loosen up below that and hide your mommy belly. I know it's hard but remember, you JUST had a baby and it does get better. Your body is still swollen too!
    DDry

    Answer by DDry at 2:28 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • Remember you just had a baby 6 weeks ago so you are still hormonal, postpartum, and sleep deprived. Lack of sleep brings on depression. Give yourself 9 months to take the weight off. It took 9 months to put it on. This is only temporary. Be kind to yourself. 

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:30 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • Oh honey. You are so not alone in this. But it's going to be okay. It's only been six weeks since you had your child so do give yourself a little break there. I've found that if you do positive things for yourself, it will make you feel better, then you can do more, and more! Are you exercising? If so, GOOD FOR YOU! Excerise releases endorphins that relieve depression and make you feel good, and exercise helps regulate your hormones. In the short-term, why not get a nice mani-pedi to lift your spirits, or do something you've always wanted to do with your hair, or even just get a new lipstick in a dynamite color you love. Next time you go shopping, bring a IRL friend with you so she can tell you in person that you do look nice! Things are going to be fine, you'll see!
    Fistandantalus

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 2:32 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • You sound very much like you have post partum depression. Talk to your doctor, sleep more, trust that you have a skewed opinion right now as your hormones are haywire. Drink your water, take your vitamins, exercise and sleep. It sounds trite and like your mother would say, but it is said because it is true and it works. You are beautiful, you are just blinded by hormones right now. Hugs.
    SusieD250

    Answer by SusieD250 at 2:32 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • I feel ya hun- but its only been 6 weeks. Cheer up :) Im sure your hubby is right, i bet you are beautiful!

    BEXi

    Answer by BEXi at 2:33 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • I had a Csec too
    LovinEveryDay

    Answer by LovinEveryDay at 2:33 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • I just looked at your pics on your profile...you look like a pretty woman. Don't be so hard on yourself. Having a baby changes our body. I took my flat tummy for granted in my early 20's. Now I miss how I looked and often just lay around the house in my pj's. It doesn't help making me feel prettier. lol. I think sometimes we just need to chill out and not be too serious. I have not went out and bought new clothes yet...I have to get rid of a lot of my pants, I still wear my maternity jeans..but they are just really comfy. :)
    mommylovesu28

    Answer by mommylovesu28 at 2:36 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

  • I would not have even considered leaving my house at 6 weeks postpartum! If I did not have to work I would still be in my house. My daughter turns 1 next Friday. You are completely normal. Your body changes after pregnancy. I have started to come to terms with this after having 2 babies and being 31. I try to be okay with myself for my daughters. I remember when I was a child my mom always saying how fat and ugly she was. My mom is beautiful! She is 5'1'' and maybe 100lbs. Imagine how I felt growing up at 5'4'' and 140 lbs. If my mother was fat then I must surely be the most obese person in the world. Don't be so hard on yourself. It has only been six weeks.
    Lexi.Mommy

    Answer by Lexi.Mommy at 2:38 PM on Apr. 9, 2009

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