Firstly, prevention: If it's predictable,it's preventable!
When she does have a tantrum: Stop her hands gently & firmly with yours. Say, "You will not break things/hurt others." Address her feelings, help her to put words and concepts to her emotions: "Wow, you are so angry! You wanted to get on the table, but Mommy said NO and you are so mad now! You want to throw things! You are feeling so mad, I see that!" Contrary to popular belief, this will not teach her that it's okay to hit and yell - but that it's okay to feel angry and to not know what to do, and that you can find OTHER ways besides acting out physically to deal with them. You can set up a "cuddle corner" which is a special safe area she can go to get calm (with snuggles if she wants); perhaps having some Angry Pillows she can hit, or a couple Nerf balls that she can throw in a Mad Mad Mad basket... these are safe, creative outlets for the physical anger she feels.
at 6:31 PM on Apr. 9, 2009