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Husband's future boss keeps coming on to me. What do I do?

My husband & I are close friends of another couple. We are in our 30's & this couple is in their late 50's. The man will be my husband's boss sometime this summer after my husband completes some training. Here's the problem: the man keeps coming on to me. He has flat out said he wants to have an "open & sharing" relationship involving emails, texts, & phone conversations & that if I wanted, a physical relationship. I've told him that I'm not comfortable with this "sharing" & while he says he respects that, he keeps pushing. It has gotten to where I am almost scared to talk in front of him because any comment I make he will interpret in a sexual context & respond in kind. If it were just some random guy, I would tell him to shove it but my DH idealizes this man & wants to keep both a friendship & a professional relationship with him. I think the wife suspects he does this stuff, but not with me. Any advice?


Asked by Anonymous at 4:13 PM on Apr. 10, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (16)
  • Tell him you are not interested and let that be that. Quit talking to him about it. Old men will try until the cows come home bc they know in a few years "it" won't get hard and work anymore. Just tell him "no thanks".

    Answer by admckenzie at 5:19 PM on Apr. 10, 2009

  • Talk to your husband about it and how it makes you feel. Hopefully he'll understand and take action.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:15 PM on Apr. 10, 2009

  • I would avoid any and all contact with this man. Tell DH EVERYTHING about what's going on.

    Answer by jennijune_21 at 4:17 PM on Apr. 10, 2009

  • Does your hubby know? I'd transfer or something to get away from that man because he'll hold your livelihood in the palm of his hands... and that's not a place I'd want to be with the way he sounds..

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 4:20 PM on Apr. 10, 2009

  • First I think you need to tell your DH about this. Then you should try not to be around this guy unless you have to...Only be around him with you DH there..

    Answer by louise2 at 4:20 PM on Apr. 10, 2009

  • I would tell your hubby. Sounds like your hubby thinks this guy is alot different then he really is. And look at it this way, would you want your hubby working for a perv like that?

    Answer by spiritguide_23 at 4:20 PM on Apr. 10, 2009

  • This guy sounds like a real scumbag. Excuse my french. First of all, remember that no job is worth your marriage. I realize that if you tell your husband, he might say some things to his future boss that will cause him to lose that opportunity. But if you don't tell him and he finds out the wrong way, there will be problems, and it might even appear that there really is something going on between the two of you. No matter what, that job opportunity is not worth your marriage. You need to tell your husband what he is saying to you and what is going on. Your husband is probably the only one that can fix the situation. Also, his wife should probably know about this. I'm sure you aren't the only one he acts this way with..

    Answer by guastella17 at 4:24 PM on Apr. 10, 2009

  • I agree, talk to your husband about it. It doesn't matter if it is his friend or boss, he should know. That way your husband can limit your contact with him. Be honest with your husband.

    Answer by pnwmom at 4:29 PM on Apr. 10, 2009

  • And here is another thought I just had. I don't know what gender your kids are, but if you have a daughter, what happens when she gets older if he startes this stuff with her?

    Answer by spiritguide_23 at 4:32 PM on Apr. 10, 2009

  • I agree with the others. Tell your hubby and get away from this. This man has power and obviously isn't afraid to use it. Before you know it will be a deal where sexual favors= better position, better pay or whatever.


    Answer by legalmommy101 at 4:32 PM on Apr. 10, 2009