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I am a divorced single mom with an 11 year old and a 16 year old. I have met a man and fallen in love. Currently we have a long distance relationship and see each other twice a month. I'd like him to move in, but I'm not sure to handle it with the kids. The older one (a girl) is all for it, the younger one (a boy) is not. Any advice?

My son has Type I diabetes. I am not completely divorced because I depend on my ex for medical insurance.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:43 PM on Apr. 13, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • Well first, how long have you two been dating? Second, only 2x a month is not a real relationship. When you are around someone CONSTANTLY it is way different than talking on the phone and seeing them 2x a month. Of course it is perfect when you two are together so infrequently, you two haven't gotten to know the real person or been tested with real relationship problems. I would say that he should move locally before you two move in together and date closer, then move in together if things still go well.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:45 PM on Apr. 13, 2009

  • If you are not married to the man you shouldn't be living with him and giving your kids that kind of example. Especially since you are still married.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:56 PM on Apr. 13, 2009

  • I personally don't feel that long distance relationships are real relationships...I think they're fantasy
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:59 PM on Apr. 13, 2009

  • Moving a man in while still married to another is just asking for problems. This doesn't sound like a truly grounded relationship yet. Build a foundation, not a long distance one, a real one. Once they move in they are hard to get rid of if it doesn't work out. Oh btw, not sure how old you are but I dated a guy who hit on my (then) 16 yr old daughter. PLEASE protect your daughter.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:14 PM on Apr. 13, 2009

  • Heck even the worse relationships would "seem" perfect with just two days a month. Anyone can come across as a really great person with spending so little time together. Really think about THEM . You need to get more involved together and spend longer periods of time together, not just 2 days a month...you need a lot more time together. Experience tough times and see how you both handle it. That is not including the little time you spend together. You need to know the good and the bad side of eachother. Do not put all your eggs in one basket. Protect your children especially your daughter.
    pnwmom

    Answer by pnwmom at 8:27 PM on Apr. 13, 2009

  • I meant "Really think about your children...not THEM. "
    pnwmom

    Answer by pnwmom at 8:28 PM on Apr. 13, 2009

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