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PORN???

my hubby said that porn is a stress reliever and a escape. I hate it. He hid it from me for a long time. Now I know it is a problem. How do I deal with it. I think he views women as objects the more he views it.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:07 PM on Apr. 14, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • Join a porn addicts support group.

    Try to get him to see that he is addicted to it, much in the way that a drug addict is addicted.

    I dealt with a porn addict for a long time. I finally left the relationship. Not just because of the porn but it played a big part in it.
    Cavalrybaby02

    Answer by Cavalrybaby02 at 2:13 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

  • He likes porn and you dont? Well, it seems as though he does have a problem, the more he uses it as stress relief the more he'll get addicted. The fact that he hid it from you, makes it even worse. So what you need to do is talk openly about it. Tell him how it makes you feel. And suggest a different way to help him out...
    More sex maybe? Im not sure though. When my boyfriend would watch porn, I would watch it with him, but sometimes it made me feel like he was dreaming of having sex with other women, and really wanting to...

    But in all honesty. Just try to help him through it, he probably has issues deep down that need to be brought out to the light....(to help of course)
    Ashleigh_17

    Answer by Ashleigh_17 at 2:15 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

  • I would be mad. You have every right to feel put out. I don't agree with porn. If my husband had hid that from me and told me it was a stress reliever we would have a major issue. I would feel hurt if my husband was objectifying other women or dreaming constantly about having sex with other random women. That would hurt my feelings.
    lilbit022009

    Answer by lilbit022009 at 2:32 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

  • What else has he hidden from you? I would ponder that one too.
    If he is addicted he, and you have a problem..
    Personally, in my home there is no porn...Porn is sick and I could care less
    for anyone on here who feels different.
    I would address this ASAP...
    Dannee

    Answer by Dannee at 2:35 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

  • Read this, it's pretty interesting and I totally agree with the author.


    "Why porn turns men off from the real thing".

    legalmommy101

    Answer by legalmommy101 at 2:48 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

  • Also here are some really great articles written on the subject (some are from men's point of view). Click here.

    legalmommy101

    Answer by legalmommy101 at 2:58 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

  • that was a really good article legalmommy101. i completely agree with it too. i think men get ideas from porn and just think all women do things like that. its degrading. i KNOW i am worth more than that junk.
    BubbysMom208

    Answer by BubbysMom208 at 3:23 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

  • It isnt automatically an issue. It is not harmful.
    He is not a smoker, alcohalic, drug addict, or cutter!
    Women love chocolate, cafemom, spas, and nature to relax.
    Men love porn, alcohal, and sports.

    If it is truely offensive to you tell him that you understand why he likes it but you feel that it is negatively affecting you and threatening your relationship.
    Have him join sexaholics anonamous and offer to try new things in the bedroom yourself. Maybe he is feeling neglected and bored in that area?
    amber710

    Answer by amber710 at 3:31 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

  • I think the whole "stress reliever" excuse is a "cop out!" by saying "stress reliever" he thinks that it sounds better than just coming out and saying " I enjoy watching sex".. Why not just be honest?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:04 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

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