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OMG what did I do wrong?!?

My 8 month old is well IDK what to even call it except for all day long he just crawls around whining because I am not holding him, I can be right next to him and if he isnt crawling and jumping all over me he whines and crys, I cant leave the room w/o him freaking out, he almost acts spoiled, and IDK what to do about it. will he ever gain some independance? or will he just stay this way? I am a stay at home mom so I am here ALL the time with him, but its just so hard to get anything done or do anything at all when he just wants to be all over me and I dont mind it most of the time, but sometimes I just need to not have baby all over me KWIM

 
hautemama83

Asked by hautemama83 at 4:09 PM on Apr. 14, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

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This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • The same thing happened to me when my son was that age. I'm a stay at home mom also and had to just finally put in some ear plugs and get work done. (After loving him up a lot and making sure he was fed, clean diaper, etc.) He eventually learned to entertain himself more.

    I think if you can't handle the idea of ignoring the fussing, maybe try one of the baby wraps you wear with the child in it. I know your son is getting heavy and it will be a strain, but even a few hours a day this close to you may make his independent time easier for him since he's gotten some extra-close time with you? Plus, the weight-lifting might help with any left over baby weight. :-)
    timelessglass

    Answer by timelessglass at 4:16 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

  • he will gain some indepence. you need to give him some alone time so he can figure that out. I don't necessarily mean leave him completely alone. just teach him slowly that you guys can coexist in the same room without him being too clingy. Lol I think I just answered something like this. Slowly leave him be, don't pick him up all the time. it will happen, 8 months is a long time to grow attatched though, don't be mad that he loves you! lol
    Adeline1210

    Answer by Adeline1210 at 4:13 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

  • You have to break the cycle. Leave the room and let him cry for a few minutes then come back and show him your there. talk to him from another room and if he is crying while on the floor let him. If you keep picking him up he is never going to stop and you dont want a lap baby. My daughter was like that and it took about 3 days to break her from wanting to be held all the time. Let him be where you are but not on you. Go to another room and talk to him but stay out of sight and soon he wont mind if you walk out because he knows your coming back.
    brailynsmama08

    Answer by brailynsmama08 at 4:14 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

  • YES I know what you mean. Babies go through a stage of seperation anxiety and it sounds like yours has hit. but I tell you what, at least he is crawling and can follow you around. When my dd had it she wasn't crawling yet, so I literally had to sneak out of the room. Basically be there as much as you can for them, lots of attention, playing and love! And when hubby is home give him the baby and go relax for at least 30 minutes! Good luck, hope he grows out of it soon. Oh the more time he spends with you around others the more comfortable he will be with others when you are not around as well!
    avpriddis

    Answer by avpriddis at 4:15 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

  • i'm also a sahm, and I know how you feel! my son was like that around that age! he's my first, so no brothers and sisters, no one ever stops by to visit. library playgroups have helped a lot. he has a few friends close to his age and I have also made some friends! if he freaks out just because you're getting up to go to the kitchen, answer the phone, blow your nose lol....etc remind him "mommy is getting some juice!" or "you hear the phone ringing? I better go get it!" and remind him you'll be right back! it might take a few times for him to get the picture that you're not disappearing off the face of the earth.
    Owl_Feather

    Answer by Owl_Feather at 4:15 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

  • I would introduce him to some other babies..go to the park... my daughter was the same way until recent and she is 15 months old... they say it a phase..
    nesamama

    Answer by nesamama at 4:17 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

  • Sleep with something big, soft and floppy (a cuddle toy or blanket!) preferably covered in terrycloth for easy washability. Sleep with it between your knees, no, I'm not kidding.

    Make him a little nest on the floor where he can see you *with* the toy that smells like mommy in it. Flip on baby Einstein dvds, I like the masters classicals collection. Munky still likes her nests, and she's 3.

    Good luck!
    MizKizzy

    Answer by MizKizzy at 4:19 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

  • Im going thru the same thing and my dd is almost 8 months...anyway, Ive heard that they go thru that phase between 7 months and 12 months....what my pedi told me too is that if you pick them up just b/c they are whining then they actually don't learn to be independent even when they get older....I just think of that when my instincts tell me to pick her up even if she's just whining a little. She doesn't actually cry but when I put her in her saucer or swing and she's acting like she is going to cry I just distract her with a toy and then go to the bathroom and tell her I'll be right back. Im only 5 feet away and it helps a little. Just do it slowly. It's harder too when you stay home b/c you're with them 24/7...she's getting to the point where she even fusses when she sees daddy. maybe your little one needs some time away from you. just to be with daddy and you can do something else so he knows you're not ALWAYS there.
    calliesmommie

    Answer by calliesmommie at 4:22 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

  • i think thats the point of peek-a-boo! to show permanence. what I used to do for my son is go to the kitchen and hide behind the wall and jump out saying "peek-a-boo!!!! he realized was still here and coming right back!
    Owl_Feather

    Answer by Owl_Feather at 4:28 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

  • I am so glad this isnt something I have caused by doing something wrong, I do know what you mean though calliesmommie, my son fusses when he sees dad too, even if we are sitting on the couch he will sit there on the floor just whining nothing else, really I love my son more than anything but that constant whining is enough to drive anyone crazy lol, I will try just leaving him be and see if it helps some, even though it breaks my heart when he whines he will whine "mom" the whole time until my sucker butt comes running in lol
    hautemama83

    Answer by hautemama83 at 4:50 PM on Apr. 14, 2009

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