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Additional info on my 15 y/o sis...

I posted by accident! I didn't get to finish!! Oh boy, this is crazy! Ok, so they've been on and off for almost 2 years. Every time (and mysteriously, always on the weekend), he'd break up with her and start dating someone else. When my sister would find someone she liked, he'd call her and say that he was confused and to wait for him, etc. She has shut so many friends out of her life for this punk. He won't allow her to have a MySpace, she cannot talk to any of her old guy friends, she can't do anything (even though they are now not dating...again). She won't listen to any of us when we say just to let him go. Even my male cousin has tried using his perspective. It just goes in one ear and out the other. I'm starting to get to the point where I'm saying let her make her own mistakes, but it still sucks. I don't want her to be unhappy and controlled...especially at her age.

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Asked by ladylila705 at 10:21 AM on Apr. 15, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

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Answers (5)
  • it sucks i feel like i was her and i should of listened to people i mean im still with him i love him i married him but sometimes i wish i had listen to my family and got a chance to meet others and have a damn teenage life! keep bugging her even though its mean to this punk introduce her to other guys nice guys that will make her open her eyes

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:28 AM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • She needs to feel SECURE, SAFE, and BETTER about her self. YOU and A group of friends and FAMILY need to get her in a room, and just be honest, get photos of abused people, stories of Abused woman make a night out of it, I have been there, DON'T GIVE UP ON HER, SHE NEEDS TO FEEL LOVED BY HER FRIENDS AND FAMILY. NO ONE WAS THERE FOR ME, I LEARNED THE HARD WAY. DON'T YOU LET HER. GOOD LUCK, IT IS A LONG HARD BATTLE, BUT YOU CAN DO IT.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:35 AM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • I wouldn't give up as long as there was the slightest chance that I could get her to wake up to what she is letting herself in for. Take her to an abused women's shelter and let her hear some of those stories about how they ended up there. Or if you know of anyone to whom she might listen, get them to try to talk to her.

    Answer by NannyB. at 2:36 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • If this is what she wants to do, NOTHING anyone says will prevent her from being with someone who abuses her...she will make up every excuse in the book as to why he does what he does BUT what's missed here is your sister has low self esteem about herself and until she's capable of finding who she is, she will continue to be misguided by this creep she's with. Also from can't take her to an abused women's shelter because most of those places are in confidential locations for the safety of women and children...

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 4:40 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • Mom2 is right about the self dd is in counseling to help reinforce that she needs to work on and love herself b4 looking to others for approval. Your sister is the one who is allowing this jerk to have power over her because she feels this attention is better than none. Try to get all family members to give her lots of attention and positive reinforcement...keep her busy with weekend activities...she will eventually realize that this relationship is not worth it and she deserves better.

    Answer by dflygirl7 at 7:42 AM on Apr. 16, 2009

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