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How do you deal with a mouthy teenager?

My teenage son who is 13 has just recently become really mouthy and I am not really sure what is the best way to deal with it .

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:57 AM on Apr. 15, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (10)
  • The mouthier he gets the less things he gets..Take a way his privileges..Tell him when he cleans his mouth  up he will get his stuff back.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 11:01 AM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • this might help
    http://www.drspock.com/article/0,1510,4171,00.html
    WhatevaItTakes

    Answer by WhatevaItTakes at 11:02 AM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • I snatch her priviledges and tell her not to say a word and just go to her room. If she says another word, I start whacking away at any of ther remaining priviledges. If she won't stop, I tell her that she obviously has too much pent up energy and start giving her chores to do. When they are done, and ONLY when the chores are done can she start working on getting those privileges back.
    4theLoveofLovey

    Answer by 4theLoveofLovey at 11:52 AM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • I would have a talk with the teenager. During that talk I would explain to them the changes I see in him and help him to understand that adoloescence is a challenging time in life. Addressing things like hormones, expectations, his perception of himself and etc. I want him to know that it is good to express him feelings but this must be done in a respectful manner. I would then let him know that because I treat him with respect I expect him to treat me with respest. After all of that, the next time, I would take his cell phone. If you can talk to me with respect you will not be able to talk to your freinds.

    Khrysalis

    Answer by Khrysalis at 11:59 AM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • Ground him. Take it all away and show him that being mouthy gets him nothing. He's not in charge. I recently dealt with a mouthy 18yo who thinks that just because he's 18 he can talk to me any way he chooses (he didn't get mouthy until he turned 18). He's in the 11th grade and actually asked me one day "and what are you going to do about it" in regards to his yelling at me. The joke was on him when he came home that same day and his cable box had been disconnected, computer and the lap top had been been password protected and his DVD player, CD player and MP3 player were all put up and he was grounded from the XBox and Wii. He found out JUST what I could and would do and now, he's a much nicer person. He watches himself now because he knows that being 18 doesn't exempt him from being grounded.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:20 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • First, I remind him that he is to respect me or else. I say things like, "Excuse me? I know you aren't talking to me that way! I brought you into this world and I'll take you back out of it!" Then I'll say something like, "Now was there something pleasant you wanted to say to me? Because if not, you feel free to go to your room right now and stay there until you know how to speak properly to me!" I am their parent and they WILL respect me, and my parents for that matter, or else! I don't put up with that crap for one second. If that doesn't work, there is a smack in the mouth, removing driving privileges, phone privileges, video games, etc. You have to lay down the law, or they'll run right over your ass!
    4kidsandadog

    Answer by 4kidsandadog at 2:37 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • I have used this statement on all three of my kids..."i am NOT your friend..i am YOUR MOTHER...you can talk to your FRIENDS like this...but you will not talk to me this way. " That sets a boundary for you. And then you follow up with the consequences~~ "if you continue to talk to me like I am your "buddy" then you can go to your room until you can talk to me like I am your mother....."

    You may need to add additional consequesnces like taking away privileges until the talk gets straight. I like what 4theloveofLovey writes..i have done this. It works.

    Kids are looking for good boundaries....and we need to set them.
    bigfinemamma

    Answer by bigfinemamma at 4:01 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • I would stop responding. I work my butt off to make sure that my kids not only have nice things but get to go to friends houses, are at their events on time and everything they need and I will not spend my precious time and money on a child who is going to treat me like the enemy. THe minute they get mouthy, you stop talking and refuse to talk to a child who is disrespecting you. NOt the silent treatment, but a nonresponsive approach. The minute they begin asking for things, which should be approx. 10 seconds, then you say...um. no I don't think so. Explain why you feel taken advantage of and used. Really, its okay to share your heart to your child. Say that it hurts you deeply to know that you would do ANYTHING for them, but they feel its okay to speak to you that way. Theres nothign wrong with being honest. It really does hurt and sometimes they forget that.
    momofsaee

    Answer by momofsaee at 7:58 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • i will talk back to him but then again what are you teaching him, right! Well take everything he likes/loves the most even if u have to take the t.v or any video games and locking them somewhere! thats what my aunti did to us!
    ALEENAzMOMMY09

    Answer by ALEENAzMOMMY09 at 2:27 AM on Apr. 16, 2009

  • i wouldn't take everything away... cause then they'll have nothing to loose and the problem could get soooooo much worse. just make a threat if they don't stop take what you threatened to take. they should shut up after that.
    Hali_Taylor

    Answer by Hali_Taylor at 4:31 AM on Apr. 18, 2009

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