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Am I completely off base here?

I don't think a husband and wife should be the end-all, be-all for eachother. We need other friends, other social aspects to our life. Since I've been married I've lost a lot of friends and have no social interaction other than the grocery store and church on occasion. I want to plan things with the few friends I've reconnected with and my husband is fighting me on it. Am I right to feel like I need this?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:52 AM on Apr. 15, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • I think it is a casse of him being jealous of the fact that he has no friends to spend time with... I know that even me sometimes when my SO goes out with his friends I get upset inside, not because I want him to myself, but because I am sad that none of my friends have children and so I am not included in anything anymore. He may just be so lonely without you... I would try asking him why it bothers him and asks if it is because he will feel so alone while you are gone.
    BriHan06

    Answer by BriHan06 at 12:23 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • Yes, darling you are very right... If you guys smother one anotther and never have any other social contact, it will put a strain on your relationship and you will no doubt get sick of oe another... You certainly don't want to get to that point, plus if you alienate your friends and family you could put a permanent rift in you relationship. Then, when you and hubby call it quits, which you will if you guys smother one another, you will not have anyone... Does he never want to see his friends?
    BriHan06

    Answer by BriHan06 at 12:03 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • If that is how you feel, then it is not wrong. He probably just feels a little threatened because he has had you all to himself for a while. He sounds insecure. Just reassure him.
    pattigioeli

    Answer by pattigioeli at 12:05 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • Ofcourse you are. It sounds like you lost yourself and your husband wants you all to himself.. What is he scared of???
    You need friends.
    Dannee

    Answer by Dannee at 12:07 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • Not sure what he is afraid of, and as far as him having friends, he doesn't, not really. He works with a couple guys and they get along good, but the friends he had for any length of time he's drifted apart from and doesn't seem to care.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:19 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • Well not having friends is his issue not yours, we are complex people and we have needs outside of marriage. I would be understanding and talk with him about it, but I would also let him know I intend to have a life outside the house.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 12:41 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • I AM SEEING LATELY I AM NOT THE ONLY ONE. IT IS I THINK HE IS INSECURE, SO IS MINE, I NOW DO WHAT I WANT HE IS GETTING OVER IT OR HE HAS TO GO. I AM NOT GOING TO MISERABLE BECAUSE HE DON'T WANT TO SOCIALIZE WITH ANYONE.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:46 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • actually, i don't mnd being with my man!!! he goes o school from 7am to 6p.m. and is home by 7!!m-f!!! on the weekends we are together all the time! i live in the country so i do what i need to do during the week!!! here soon he won't be home for awhile as he will be truck driving over the road and only home from late friday and then have to go back out sunday enening and the same thing over again!!! so i guess it depends on what life style you have!!! we go out to dinner or to the movies or even to the heath eagles just to hear a band and see our friends there!!! you never know what you got til it's gone and he is my world!!! yes, everyone needs their time and what not but like i said, it depends on your life style and how you two decide to live your lives!!!
    BELLENTERRY

    Answer by BELLENTERRY at 1:42 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • YOU ARE NOT OFF BASE AT ALL, IF YOU HAVE A STABLE MARRIAGE AND TRUST THERE IS NO REASON FOR HIM TO OBJECT TO THIS.
    older

    Answer by older at 1:45 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • he's just scared he'll lose you to them. Assure him there needs to be a good balance of friends and family
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 1:56 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

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