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What to do when other people introduce foods to your baby?

i was so upset a few months ago when my dh's aunt fed my baby a Peanut Butter & Jelly Sandwich (when DD was maybe 6-7 months) luckily nothing happened (but i thought everyone knew about that one), or before that, when I heard my mom say "you want some breakfast (mom was eating eggs at the time)" and i told her "NO! babies can be highly allergic to those" so (after i went upstairs) she didn't feed it to her but put the spoon which she was using to DD's lips... which made her break out into a rash. Mom was very sorry... but still. grr!!

Then recently my father fed my baby strawberries... i had no idea that was something that could cause BAD allergic reactions!! normally before i introduce anything i research it first! but these people man! GOD! couldn't you ask me first!!!? you know? her mother? what if someone feeds her something and i had no idea.. then i get home and she's hiving up and having trouble breathing. rant much?


Asked by Anonymous at 11:58 AM on Apr. 15, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • It's hard because often it's a generational thing... people our parents' age don't know some of the things we know to be cautious of... My parents bought a used carseat for our daughter to use on visits but it looked like a deathtrap to me (didn't even have a 5-point harness) and we she had to ride home from the airport in it (7 weeks old) before I could explain to my mom that I wasn't comfortable. You need to let your family and any one else who will be caring for your child (while you're there or not) that you decide what baby gets to eat. You can blame the pediatrician if you don't want to sound patronizing. Believe it or not, even total strangers may try to feed your child when she's a toddler... happened to us just the other day at the Zoo, a woman was trying to give my 22 month-old a chunk of apple! And when I said no she wanted to know why! Why? allergies, choking, I'M HER MOTHER!

    Answer by EmilySusan at 12:08 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • btw. thankfully nothing happened with the strawberries... dd loves 'em. =\... but still if something DID happen.. *sigh*..

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:59 AM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • That's crossing the line and very rude. You need to tell them to back off and that MOMMY will decide what she eats!

    Answer by calliesmommie at 12:02 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • what do I do? I get mad lol. while visiting relatives, we had cake for my birthday and my dad, who was very tipsy fed my son some chocolate cake. he was 6 m/o at the time. he was pretty fussy before the cake and stopped after the bite and dad laughed: "yeah he wasnt supposed to have any, but noticed he stopped fussing?" grrrrr. and at easter, it wasnt offered all up in his face, but the grandma and granpa both offered him chocolcate. he is barely 1 year old, and hasnt tried it yet. they compared my saying no to their daughters baby who eats everything. but I'm careful about my son's diet.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:03 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • Things have changed alot since your parents had babies. Just explain that they need to check with you first.

    Also, in case you didn't know... you should tell your pediatrician about the reaction to the eggs because one of the vaccines has egg yolk or something in it. I remember my pediatrician asking if he had eggs before giving it to him.  


    Answer by MAUREEN55 at 12:06 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • You could make a list of foods that you have introduced and tape in on your mom and mils fridge. Add to it as you introduce new foods. Put a friendly reminder that your daughter can only have what's on the list, and absolutely nothing else. If people bug you about it just say "well, I guess she doesn't need to visit Grandma if Grandma can't respect the rules!"

    Answer by julipickle2 at 12:10 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • Also you could tell her that if she doesn't want to feed your daughter foods you approve of then she doesn't need to feed your daughter at all.

    Answer by julipickle2 at 12:15 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • I have the same issue with my in laws well my husbands mom and step dad! they are constantly giving my son new foods when he is over there i have actually stopped taking him over there too much because they will wait until i am out of site and then give it to him.... i have even walked in and seen my hubbys step dad letting my son have a drink of his beer and when i say anything he says oh its not gunna hurt him its good for him..... it makes me soooooo mad cause if i do say anything they always know best cause they gave it to their kids when they were little! And it is worse because they are my neighbors! its aggravating i know! my hubbys dad and step mom on the other hand always ask before they give him anything. I too don't know what to do because they still do it even though i say not too!

    Answer by TatymMommi at 12:53 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • Sounds like you are overreacting. Unless there is a history of allergy in the family, there is no need to avoid the foods. In fact, recent studies suggest exposing your children earlier to prevent allergies. I do believe it is disrepectful of anyone to offer your baby food w/o asking, even family as they may not know what your baby is allergic too.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:03 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • Anon -- the AAC still currently recommends waiting until after the 1st year to introduce peanuts, and the real point here is that she's the mom, and they have no right whatsoever to disrespect her rules.

    Answer by EmilySusan at 1:20 PM on Apr. 15, 2009