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My husband is leaving because I don't have sex enough

I am 28 and have been married for 4 years we have 3 kids 7mo-4yrs. I go to work full time and am a full time student have absolutely no sex drive so my husband left me a note this morning he is leaving but I love him and don't want him to go I have been crying all morning any suggestions?

 
Mom0f306

Asked by Mom0f306 at 12:50 PM on Apr. 15, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (22)
  • Do not listen to these women that are saying he already has somebody else. There may be somebody else talking to him but that does not mean that he has been unfaithful to you. You are the one in the wrong & you are the one that needs to fix this. There is always a woman willing to pick up a man so don't let yours go! He was honest with you. Had he been unfaithful, he could have just continued with the affair or just left with no explanation. Go find your man, ask him to forgive you & then make love like never before.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:18 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • If he's willing to leave because of sex, then he's really not worth it. You could try therapy but it sounds like you have a lot on your plate and he's a total asshole for wanting to split up a family because of his selfishness.

    legalmommy101

    Answer by legalmommy101 at 12:52 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • If he is shallow enough to leave because you don't put out enough...you need to rethink if you really want him around.
    CarolynBarnett

    Answer by CarolynBarnett at 12:52 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • If hes leaving because of not getting any loving than he doesn't love you! What kind of BS is that! You trying to better your life and he ain't giving you no act right. Now if you feel like you need him in your life than take some natural energy sex booster {or whatever you call it} and give him so much sex that he want even think straight!
    diamondmamma

    Answer by diamondmamma at 12:53 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • Counseling. If he is leaving you over sex there is a deeper issue and sex is the easy cop out. Have you tried shipping the kids off to family or friends for a night so you can be with him alone? Maybe try doing something for yourself like getting your hair or nails done. Maybe buying a new outfit. You have to put in to your marriage to get things out of your marriage. As our marriage counselor tells us its not the tools your given its how you use the tools you have. Marriage is work and if your not willing to put in the time and effort then its a job your going to loose.
    brailynsmama08

    Answer by brailynsmama08 at 12:53 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • Sorry, your not alone, my guys old room mate let his wife when she hit menopause because she didn't felt uncomfortable when he touched her, I know I don't do it every second my guy wants, and he does get mad,but he gets over it too, did he ever try to talk to you about this before? DId you talk to him now, maybe you can tell him that you guys can have a night or nights to do it or something, Hope nyou feel better
    NicholeAT

    Answer by NicholeAT at 12:54 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • I'd be willing to be the real reason he's leaving is not lack of sex. There's a million other reasons. Regardless of what his reasons are, he's a skunk for leaving you a note and jumping ship. Is he willing to work on the marriage? Have you tried counselling? Is there another person involved? When you know the answers to these questions, you'll know what to do.

    Have a good cry and get it all out. Then put your thinking cap on and come up with a plan.
    GL
    companygoddess

    Answer by companygoddess at 12:55 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • and people wonder why men cheat....have sex w the man...geez!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:57 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • It sounds like he is highly frustrated. Sex is important in a marriage, though it is not everything. It is wrong for you to not give yourself to your husband just like it would be wrong for him to withhold his love from you. He probably just doesn't know what to do. If he 'naggs' about it then you are not giving yourself to him because you WANT to but because he 'nagged' you into it. People NEED to feel that their spouse desires them. You have killed a part of your marriage & need to ask him to forgive you & come home.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:01 PM on Apr. 15, 2009

  • DAMN, I DON'T HAVE SEX WITH HIM, AND HE STILL WON'T LEAVE. I know what he is feeling but he needs to help me more, and then maybe I would give him some, and if he cheated Bye Bye, I can do what I am doing now by my self.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:02 PM on Apr. 15, 2009