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going from dads house to moms house

My son turned 4 the 8th of this month. He lives with his dad because i was going threw a lot when he was a baby and we (his dad and I) decided it was best for him to live with dad. Well i go and pick him up about 1 time per month and keep him for about a week. He lives about 3 hrs away so going more often is just not something i can do everyother weekend... Well DS was here over easter weekend and i told him to go in his room and get his stuff that he is goin to take to his dads together. he said " I am not going to my daddys chris is going to be my daddy now and i am going to stay here." chris is my husband. what am i supposed to say to that. i did take him back to his dad but it just makes me feel bad that he said this. is this just normal for a child that has 2 houses or what should i do. it is really bothering me. the problems i had when he was a baby is not there anymore.

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Asked by Anonymous at 2:02 PM on Apr. 16, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (3)
  • I would see about joint custody and have him more often. I know the distance is an issue too, but if you have joint then his dad will have to make part of the drive as well and it will not only be on you. GL my friend is going through this too. When she got divorced her son was 2 (7 now) and his dadowned the house they lived in so she let him stay with his dad so she could get on her feet. Now his dad has 6 people living in a 2 bedroom house and she has her own house that he has his own room and he still wont let him go live with her it is turning ugly and she finally is having to go to court.

    Answer by AK_aries at 2:51 PM on Apr. 16, 2009

  • It sounds like maybe he wants to spend more time with you. I agree with the previous person who said you should see about joint custody.

    Answer by tropicalmama at 2:59 PM on Apr. 16, 2009

  • Joint custody will be difficult when he starts school. Is there anyway you can move closer to them? He is saying this because he is enjoying time at your house. I would wager he loves being in his house with his daddy. Kids try to please us and that is what he is doing with you right now. Until he starts school try to get him for an additional long weekend. Once school starts you will have to drive more so you can have him on the weekends. Maybe you have him from Friday night until Sunday night two weekends a month and rotate holidays. Joint custody when you live so far apart is impossible.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:08 PM on Apr. 16, 2009

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