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When "NO" doesn't work.

My son will be 13months on the 25th, and he will not listen. I know he is still young but, He will not stop hitting his sister and throwing things at her. And she is only a month old. When I tell him No or move his hand so he doesnt hit her then he hits me, or starts screaming!!! Plus from the time that he wakes up until he has to go to bed it seems like all he does is whine or cry. I don't know what to do. Its hard enough taking care of two kids. But it's harder when one doesn't listen or is screaming all the time. Any advice?

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Asked by proud_mommy1322 at 2:38 AM on Apr. 18, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 3 (17 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • HE IS STILL A BABY! You had them very close poor fella!

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:41 AM on Apr. 18, 2009

  • yeah that helps anon.... Sounds like he is acting out due to there being a new kid in town... It has only been him for 12months and now he has to share is time with another child.... He just need to see that you will be there for him.... Also try to show him how much fun it is to have a baby sibling.... Get him to feed the baby and maybe hold the baby and tell him that he is a big brother and big brothers protect and help their little brother or sister... GL momma... I hope it works for ya!

    Answer by soonmommyof3 at 2:46 AM on Apr. 18, 2009

  • well, if he was a little older id say its time for a good ol fashion ass whoopin..but he's still young for kids are barely a yr apart..fortunately i didnt have this problem w mine..maybe a little slap on the hand? or put him in his crib when he acts like this? he's still at a young stage so its hard on trying to discipline him

    Answer by tnteaton at 3:06 AM on Apr. 18, 2009

  • Its not to early to start a form of time out. A minute sitting in one spot would be worth starting now. I know the Nanny did this and it seemed to work,lol. If I were you I'd probably take a look at her book.
    Also make sure he is still getting GOOD attention. The baby is getting all this love and fuss but he may only be getting it when he acts like this. He is being awarded (via attention) for acting out.

    Answer by MamaChamp at 3:30 AM on Apr. 18, 2009

  • if no isnt working either spank his ass or put him in time out stay firm

    Answer by Breezy1988 at 3:31 AM on Apr. 18, 2009

  • anon 2:41 he needs to know that throwing things at his sister is NOT ok whether he's still a "baby" its no excuse i cant believe you would say that

    Answer by Breezy1988 at 3:32 AM on Apr. 18, 2009

  • A word of advice - it takes over a hundred times repeating something for behavior patterns to start sticking with kids - you have to be consistent - it's the best and most reliable way of working with children's behavior issues. He's too young to understand the word "No" - to give him the word, followed by a POSITIVE behavior he can engage in - it's called re-direction and takes more energy than swatting a butt, but gives him a more positive discipline model for the long-term. Also, reflect back to him his emotions at a level he understands, using words and gestures so that HE understands that YOU understand what he's trying to communicate. Remember, also, that he's entering a VERY inquisitive stage - don't smother his natural curiosity by always telling him no. Find all the Yesses you can give him - remove him from a situation (like hitting his sister) and re-focus his attention on something else he can do. PATIENCE.

    Answer by JPsMommy605 at 8:49 AM on Apr. 18, 2009

  • my son is 16 months old. he get into everything. now i don't have another child but i do know about him having behaviors that aren't allowed. i started smacking hands and if he doesn't stop a gentle swat on his butt. the sound scares him more than anything. i know some people don't like spanking. i also do time outs too. all three work. it just depends on the situation.

    Answer by proudmama1207 at 9:27 AM on Apr. 18, 2009

  • Yes, just hit him and tell him not to hit. That'll work for a 13 month old...

    Show more attention to the baby when he hits. My first reaction is usually to run to the hitter and say no! Which, uh, doesn't work! Try running to the baby and oooooooh, you poor thing, he hit you, hitting is a no. Don't hold him or anything. Just pay attention to the baby for a minute, then turn to the older baby and say "no hit!" Keep it simple. Then bring him to the baby, and work with him on nice touches. It takes a lot of time, but my kids are 18 months apart, and this is what I did, and it worked.

    Answer by apexmommy at 10:49 AM on Apr. 18, 2009

  • No needs to have consequences: If you do that again your (insert snuggly or favorite toy here) will go in the closet for five minutes. Then do it. Ignore the screams and hysteria, and calmly explain why you did what you did. Let him see the timer and explain how it works. Be calm, gentle and firm.

    Answer by rkoloms at 12:04 PM on Apr. 18, 2009

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