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How can I get my husband to help?!

I am trying to get my 3 1/2 year old daughter to start using the potty for pee pee all the time and start getting her to poop on the potty as well. But when I mention new ways I read about to try he freaks out and says it is cruel to things like that.. meaning poop jail.. Im ok with her going all day in panties and trying that instead of her pull up but he freaks out if anything gets dirty at all. Even though I am the one who cleans everything. But he says no I cant do that, or make her sit on the potty till she goes either. but then he gets mad when she fills up a million pull ups with pee and poop. Any Ideas? oh ps he starts work on monday at his new job, since we recently moved here.


Asked by shannonsmomm at 5:07 PM on Apr. 19, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (6)
  • well if hes starting work, he wont be home much to help anyways.... just do it whatever way you can so that you dont have to deal with the complaining. then do it your own way when he's not home. she'll understand in a few days/weeks that when daddys home things are done differently. my son is about to be three and knows how things work when daddys home and when hes not. and same thing for when im not here and only daddy is. i wouldnt keep her there till she goes. keep her in panties ALL day long. night time she can wear pull ups or whatever. we use generic diapers b/c they are cheaper and ONLY used at night.

    Answer by mommykayti at 5:34 PM on Apr. 19, 2009

  • Take her every half hour and have her try. Praise her when she does. If you want him to help, have him take over part of the potty duty. Say you do it on the half hour and he does it on the hour.

    Answer by Bmat at 5:14 PM on Apr. 19, 2009

  • I would tell your husband to get over it. Poo and wee are natural and if he wants this part of the whole parenting thing to go smoothly and be over quickly he needs to get involved and help you.

    If he doesn't like the suggestions you make for helping your daughter learn how to use the potty regularly then ask him for suggestions.

    Sorry if this sounds harsh, it just makes angry how men can be over such silly things as poop!

    Answer by keyaziz at 5:34 PM on Apr. 19, 2009

  • oh and btw, i did the whole potty training thing on my own. with NO help, even though i couldve had help from daddy if i wanted it. it was just easier for us because then i could do it MY way and DS wouldnt get confused with two people telling him differently all day long. =]

    Answer by mommykayti at 5:36 PM on Apr. 19, 2009

  • No woman on earth other than his mother, can "make" any husband do anything he doesn't want to. You could try "Either you stop freaking out and trust me and HELP me potty train her, or you can make friends with your hand for after-dark play, handsome." It won't work, and the stress from the new job and his obvious aversion to body functions will just make things worse.

    So do as the other mum above suggested, once handsome is off to work and out of your hair, take your baby potty every hour or so. IF HER BODY IS PHYSIOLOGICALLY MATURE ENOUGH to retain urine or bowel movements, then you will have her all set in about a month. If her body IS NOT that mature, guess what? All you'll do is cause trouble.

    If her body isn't ready, you can still make a fun game out of an hourly potty trip, just to get her used to it.

    And lose the damned pull-ups. Get the girl some PANTIES, and remind her, Try not to mess them up, sweety!

    Answer by Morniel at 7:51 PM on Apr. 19, 2009

  • Tell him either he can potty train her or he can shut up and let you do it your way. He can't honestly expect a toddler to potty train without accidents.

    Answer by MammaMcC at 10:18 PM on Apr. 19, 2009