My life is like the show "Everybody Loves Raymond". My MIL is just like "Marie. She comes into our home & unplugs my air fresheners (even the one in our bedroom-when the door was closed). I feel that she does not respect our privacy or decisions we make as a married couple. My DH has talked to her several times about knocking before walking into our house (she never calls 1st). But, she always wants to control SOMETHING in our home. We have a 6 yr old DS & 6 mo DD. I posted a note over the doorbell that reads "Do Not Ring Bell-Baby Sleeping". My MIL wrote "PLEASE" with a permanent marker on the wall above my note. I am tired of always being told & feeling like I am not a good enough wife for her son or a good enough mother for her grandkids. I do the best I know how everyday. When I try to tell her how I feel, she gets mad, storms out & calls my hubby at work crying (I'm sure it's a show) telling him I'm mean & ungrateful.Answer Question
Asked by Anonymous at 11:15 AM on Apr. 20, 2009 in Relationships
Answer by Anonymous at 11:21 AM on Apr. 20, 2009
Answer by HunnysFarAway at 11:31 AM on Apr. 20, 2009
Answer by kylie4 at 11:50 AM on Apr. 20, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 11:53 AM on Apr. 20, 2009
Does she have a key to your home? If so change the locks NOW. If she doesn't have a key, keep the door locked - she can't come in if the door is locked - just because she is at your door doesn't mean you need to let her in. IF she calls, you don't have to answer. You need to talk to your DH let him know how you feel - what does DH say when MIL calls him at work and cries about you being so "mean" to her? Does he see how overbearing and controlling she is too? DH needs to talk w/MIL set up some boundaries - and consequences when she crosses those boundaries - the key is to ENFORCE the boundaries. If MIL feels the need to control something - tell her to control her OWN life and let you/DH control /live yours. Sounds like MIL needs to cut the apron strings.
Check this group out www.cafemom.com/group/32665. These ladies give STELLAR advice - most have overbearing control freak MIL's like yours!
Answer by Fooph121780 at 12:09 PM on Apr. 20, 2009
The first ANON MUST be a MIL... haha.
LOCK the door, always. Then she can't just walk in. I would just sit her down, with your hubby and you guys tell her how you feel. Then leave the rest up to her. If she wants to go by what you guys want fine if not she can leave...
Answer by Navymama at 12:44 PM on Apr. 20, 2009