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dont know what else to do.. again..

alright moms. i'm at a loss here. i dont know what else to do. my son is 2.5 years old. and he wont listen. we went to the library today and OMG.. he threw himself ont he floor cried and cried.. because he wanted to go upstairs.. i dont kno what to do anymore.. we tried.. the corner taking everything away. we tried.. time-out.. we tried talking. yelling. putting him in his room.. we have even tried spanking and nothing works.. its like okk.. wtf?? what do i do. i've taken alot of advise and used it but it hasnt worked.. i dont know... i just dont know anymore i got a parenting book but i really need more.. i need something new.. i need help1!!!!

what do i do with him? he wont listen. he hits he yells. he's two.. i know but my patience is running short.. i dont know......

 
MommaBear1129

Asked by MommaBear1129 at 5:02 PM on Apr. 20, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 2 (6 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • Try giving him options. Ex.. if you are at the library again, before going in, tell him what you would like to do while there, and ask him what he would like to do. Then tell him.. okay, mommy has to do this first, then if you are good, we will do what you would like to do. (or if what he would like to do is not an option, give a good alternative).. Stay positive, and he will stay positive.
    xxhazeldovexx

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 6:37 PM on Apr. 20, 2009

  • if youre out somewhere and he does it take him back to the car and go home, if you can of course.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:04 PM on Apr. 20, 2009

  • we did go home. and he's upstairs in his room grounded to his bed after he got spanked.. now he's crying he's been cryin for about and hr now. he got up about 30 min ago went in the bathroom and put all the paper in the toilet.. its like wtf?? u kno its bad why do you do it?
    MommaBear1129

    Answer by MommaBear1129 at 5:07 PM on Apr. 20, 2009

  • When you put him in time out, does he yell and scream? Is he still yelling and screaming when time is up... which sort of means he never really realized he was in time out?
    That's what was happening to me.
    Now, I put my daughter in time out and if she pitches a fit, I tell her to go ahead and scream. Time will NOT start until she is calm. Once she is calm, I start the clock for her time out. If she is just pitching a fit (but hasn't broken any rules), I still put her in her time out/ calm down spot and let her pitch her fit there. She learned very quickly to calm herself back down so we could talk about what happened, how she felt, and why it was a no-no.

    If we are in a public place, I let her pitch her fit right there on the floor. The only exceptions are resturants and quiet places like the library. Then I take her outside and let her pitch her fit there.
    kaycee14

    Answer by kaycee14 at 5:07 PM on Apr. 20, 2009

  • My LO in the same age and has acted that way too. After the first few times I started talking to him about what behavior I expected before we even get out of the car. I tell him if he yells or hits or runs off We will leave.

    We now make a deal that he will behave on the outing or we do not even get out of the car.
    It has worked like a charm for us.

    Make sure you are telling exactly what he isn't allowed to do, because at that age they don't know what the word tantrum means, but they do know specific things like yelling, hitting, biting., etc.

    Good luck and just remember that in a few years you will look back at this time and miss it.
    Nathskitten

    Answer by Nathskitten at 5:09 PM on Apr. 20, 2009

  • WHAT!!!!!!!!!! Did you bust his butt and take him home and put his butt to bed????? I would be all over my boy like white on rice!!!! You cant let him do these things to ya mama, you will go nutz one day.. just bust him.. and keep bustn him till he sees his future with a hurtn butt..
    HottMamaRossx2

    Answer by HottMamaRossx2 at 5:09 PM on Apr. 20, 2009

  • One other thing I've read and experinced myself - do NOT use the bedroom as a punishment place. First off, it's full of toys. Second, it should be a peaceful haven. But the biggest reason is that he needs to be able to see you. When a toddler is in the middle of a fit, he is being pounded by powerful emotions that he can't control and that scare him. If you leave the room or send him somewhere by himself, it adds even more fear since you are not there to intervene and help him if needed - not that he actually needs help but in his little mind you are an anchor to keep him safe. Keep him in your sight but don't talk to him or interact beyond taking him back to his punishment spot.
    kaycee14

    Answer by kaycee14 at 5:10 PM on Apr. 20, 2009

  • you know he stops his fit when he's in time out.. as soon as he's done.. he starts over and basically its a back and forth thing.. when i sit him down adn tell him to calm it or he'll be their all day he'll sit their quietly. as soon as his time is up he'll start over.. its like umm.. okk..

    so as for public places.. well at the library... i took him to the bathroom and let him cry and cry.. then he was done and we went in then he ran from me. he said no i dont want too and cried some more.. i grabbed the book i needed and bolted out of their..

    i'm going crazy dont know what else to do...
    MommaBear1129

    Answer by MommaBear1129 at 5:11 PM on Apr. 20, 2009

  • And I agree with Nathskitten. Layout the ground rules before leaving home. This helped so MUCH when I finally realized I should do it...
    We are going to ____.
    We are going to do ____ while we are there.
    I expect you to ____ (sit in the basket seat, not yell and scream, etc).
    If you do what I expect, we will ___ (something small like a single cookie or stop at the park)
    If you misbehave, I will ____.

    Keep it short. I was really surprised at how well this helped.
    kaycee14

    Answer by kaycee14 at 5:13 PM on Apr. 20, 2009

  • No wonder he's pissed off. He doesn't remember at this point why he's in trouble. You're over-punishing, it sounds like. Pick something and stick to it, but whatever you do, do it immediately. Time outs at age 2 should be 2 minutes. You don't bring a two year old home, spank them for something they did an hour ago, then lock them in their room all night and magically expect a happy toddler.
    apexmommy

    Answer by apexmommy at 5:28 PM on Apr. 20, 2009

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