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How do I spice things up?!?

My husband and I have been married for 3.5 yrs now; things between us emotionally and verbally are great! However, we seem to be hitting a wall in the bedroom. Having a 2 yr old has turned us into old folks! We go to bed early and if we have sex its pretty routine and same old same old... Even outside of the sex we aren't super romantic anymore, we don't go on dates, we don't cuddle, we don't really make time for "us". We don't really get adventurous or super passionate... Even though he tells me he thinks everything is great I know he has to wish somewhere in the back of his head things could be like they were pre-toddler. What can I do to help us out?


Asked by Anonymous at 9:33 AM on Apr. 21, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • You need to find a babysitter at least once a month. You have to put time aside for the couple as well. It isn't all about the kids, you have to find the reason why you are still married and stick with that. If you could find the time or at least make the time, and have a date at least once a month and maybe even get a hotel room or something like that. Then maybe you could start spicing up the bedroom even when you guys are at home. The key point is that you have to set aside for mom and dad and just remember there is a reason why you are still in love with the person on the other side of the bed.

    Answer by ltevis at 10:30 AM on Apr. 21, 2009

  • Start with making time just for eachother. Spend alone time together. Get a sitter for a few hours on a weekend to have dinner, talk, watch a movie...and have sex. lol. I went through this with my husband after the birth of our first child. It gets better. Now that my kids are older, it's easier to get time to talk to just him and be with just him. Good luck.

    Answer by mamaada at 9:52 AM on Apr. 21, 2009

  • I would start by doing different positions and using different rooms.
    And then start doing it at different times during the day.

    I noticed with my relationship, one thing that killed it was the whole :
    "Wait until we go to bed. Then we can do it exactly like the night before..."
    It can murder your sex life lol

    Answer by MandyOs at 9:54 AM on Apr. 21, 2009


    Look here you will love it ,


    Answer by Anonymous at 10:44 AM on Apr. 21, 2009

  • I refused advice on this subject for a long time. Everyone said to take time just for us and I refused to leave our child with anyone to go do anything together. Now what I would give for someone to just take this kid so we could stay home alone!!! I know it sounds cheesy, but get some massage oils and take some time to appreciate each others bodies. Make it work!!

    Answer by wildsun at 1:10 PM on Apr. 21, 2009