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i have a 13 month old and i am due in july!

i was holding my friends baby and my 13 month old got very jealous. i have heard about buying a baby doll to get the one child used to mommy having another child to hold too, but my husband thinks that i am over reacting and that owyn will be fine to adjust by himself. what do i do?

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disheveled

Asked by disheveled at 3:40 PM on Apr. 21, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 3 (17 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • i've bought my daughter a realistic doll that looks newborn size, she also got diapers with it and bottles. shes got a rocking chair for xmas, so we are putting that next to mine. she will get her baby when mommy goes to the hospital to have the families baby. there is a book called "I'm a Big Brother" (i got mine the big sis version same exact thing just changes brother to sister) and she loves it and understands babies a little better. we are also going to have a little bday party when she comes to visit at the hospital. w/mini cupcakes, she'll pick out a present for baby w/my mom while i'm in the hospital and she will get a small big sister gift. just make sure he understands you still love him, spend time w/him when baby sleeps. i've heard to come in the door before baby when you get home and spend a few mins w/him before someone else brings in the new baby. there are lots of suggestions if you do a google search
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 3:44 PM on Apr. 21, 2009

  • He'll be fine and adjust by himself.

    But I can only go by my guys.....
    TiccledBlue

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 3:44 PM on Apr. 21, 2009

  • You have to make him part of the routine. Let him help..bring a diaper or toy..something little.

    You will tell the toddler to "wait a minute, the baby needs something". You should also tell the baby, "Wait a minute, toddler needs me". Doesn't matter if the baby is asleep or awake! The toddler needs to know that HE is not the only one who has to do some waiting. It's just something he needs to hear once in a while.

    Work the baby into the toddler's daily routine as best you can. (tried it both ways and this one was easier!!!)
    TiccledBlue

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 3:46 PM on Apr. 21, 2009

  • What happened with me was this. My son was 13 months old when my daughter was born. I didn't push him away when I was holding my daughter or tell him no . he adjusted very well. I didn't ignore him
    Michele068

    Answer by Michele068 at 3:54 PM on Apr. 21, 2009

  • I think he will be fine eventually..I would get my son involved and get him to help me..or just reassure him as much as possible.
    keyaziz

    Answer by keyaziz at 5:04 PM on Apr. 21, 2009

  • I was taking care of a friends baby for a while, and my DD was very jealous for the first few days espeshly when I'd feed the other baby, she would scream and scream [I felt so bad] but when I would feed the other baby I would hold her hand, and then when I was done taking care of him I'd pick her up, give her a hug and we'd cuddle for a while, after a few days of her crying she realized that mommy has to take care of another baby and so she'd go play with her toys...now their good friends
    Allikats-momma

    Answer by Allikats-momma at 7:28 PM on Apr. 21, 2009

  • That's about the spacing for my kids... they were 15 months apart. My older daughter reacts violently when I hold other babies, but NOT her own sister. Even though she didn't fully understand at the beginning, she didn't get upset when I cared for her sister. I've heard it's worse actually when they're more than 18 months apart... At first most of the time she didn't pay her sister any attention... babies aren't very exciting... it was like she didn't even see her (I'd ask her to give something to her sister and she'd walk over to the swing expecting her to be there -- even though I had been holding the baby for the past hour!). Then by around 18 months she looked for her when she wasn't there. I think by then she had no recollection of life without her little sis. They're so cute together. The little one's 7 months now. I think it will only get more and more fun...
    EmilySusan

    Answer by EmilySusan at 8:30 PM on Apr. 21, 2009

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