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For those who had a baby out of wedlock and attend/ed church at that time

So the question about the baby shower for someone not married got me thinking. What was the reaction you got from the people at your church if you were pregnant before you were married or never got married??
Me:: At first there was lots of whispers and gossip going on about me. I however am hardheaded and believe in standing up for myself. One of the elders at our church TOLD me I HAD to confess to the congergation and ask for forgiveness. (the other 4 elders disagreed with him) I thought about it for a couple days and the Sunday morning after he told me that I did go up front to address the congergation. Of course what I said shocked them. I went up there and told them that I was NOT sorry for what i had done bc sorry means 1. wont do it again and 2. wished it hadnt happened. Neither of those pertained to me. I did however tell them that I forgave THEM for judging and gossiping about me, and reminded them that what -CONT-

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theheartbaby

Asked by theheartbaby at 8:52 PM on Apr. 22, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 1 (3 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • -CONT- they were doing was a sin as well. I told them if they had any further questions or comments to please come to me with them since I was more than happy to tell them anything they felt they needed to know. Yea they sat there looking stunned but after service I had numerous people come to apologize to me for what they had done and some even asked me questions about the situation but my FAVORITE was this one lady asked me "How did this happen? I can't believe you would disgrace your family like this. You are a selfish brat." I looked at her confused and said "Are you asking me about the birds and the bees or are you asking what position we were in?"
    theheartbaby

    Answer by theheartbaby at 8:55 PM on Apr. 22, 2009

  • LOL! That is too funny! I don't really go to church because of people like that. Hypocrits. I think that you had every right to stand up for yourself and your unborn child. I am so glad that you didn't apologize. You go girl! They were in the wrong. Not you!
    tonya212288

    Answer by tonya212288 at 9:05 PM on Apr. 22, 2009

  • Well, you made a decision, it is nobody's business. People these days are too judgemental. I know sex before marriage is a sin, but that doesn't give me or anyone else or some dumb ANON (anon :03) the right to judge you and call your child a bastard.
    Kaci_Eden

    Answer by Kaci_Eden at 9:07 PM on Apr. 22, 2009

  • And to that other girl that just commented... who are you to judge her. People like you are the reason people like me aren't in church. If she wants to go to church she can. I got her back all the way. Judging someone is also a sin and her child is not a bastard! Welcome to the 21st century!
    tonya212288

    Answer by tonya212288 at 9:08 PM on Apr. 22, 2009

  • HAHAHA O ANON :03 You darling have NO idea who you are dealing with!!! I grew up in that church and my family SUPPORTED my decision to speak (I told them before hand) and I gained RESPECT from the people at church and pointed out that they too are sinners and if they are truly christians hoping to one day have God say to them "My child I forgive you for you have forgiven others" (BC yes in the bible it says GOD will judge YOU the way YOU judge others!) And I still go to church every Sunday and Wednesday night I can go (Not tonight bc my son is sick!) AND HOW DARE YOU CALL MY SON A BASTARD!!! Go look at my profile and you see that AMAZINGLY WONDERFUL man holding him??? YEA THATS his DADDY!!!
    theheartbaby

    Answer by theheartbaby at 9:19 PM on Apr. 22, 2009

  • Anon: 8:03 I hope you realize that your RIDICULOUS comment was indeed a SIN! Omg you sinned I bet you can't even believe it! God says treat others with love and kindness the way you would want to be treated by them. And I'm pretty sure you did the exact opposite of that with your smartass little comment. In my opinion you are a horrible horrible person for ever saying something so disrespectful and unloving of an innocent child. I hope you go to hell for believing you are living such a sin-free perfect life. God loves the sinner, not those who think they never sin and are perfect. OP I think that is great what you said and I would have said the same thing.
    Ash9724

    Answer by Ash9724 at 9:27 PM on Apr. 22, 2009

  • anon 8:03, you are the type of person that keeps me from going to church. Hyporcrites. I really feel sorry for your children. I had no issues with people at my church when I got pregnant. My family didn't turn their backs on me and never would. Also, DO NOT EVER CALL MY SON A BASTARD, He is an amazing, intelligent, respectful and polite GIFT from GOD. I raised him to NOT judge others because we don't know what someone's situation is. From what I learned in the 9 years of Catholic School, I was taught to not judge others, that God loves everyone and that NO ONE is perfect. Also, God loves the sinner not the sin. Did you ever hear, treats others as you would want to be treated?

    OP: Good for you for standing up for yourself. You should never be sorry for something as wonderful as your GIFT FROM GOD!
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 9:55 PM on Apr. 22, 2009

  • What church do you go to? Man I was pregnant before I was married no one had any problems.
    Rachel24517

    Answer by Rachel24517 at 9:56 PM on Apr. 22, 2009

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