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what would you do?

okay i have two teens that think they are the shit. if i tell then they cant do something they tell me what a bad mother i am. if i discipline them for acting stupid or back talking they tell me they dont want to be with me and they cant wait till they can leave. my son got in trouble tonight for butting in when he wasnt supposed to and then mouthing me and he left and told me he was going to go to school and tell them to call the cops because i was abusive to him now what would you do?

 
jodi205

Asked by jodi205 at 9:18 PM on Apr. 22, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 17 (4,145 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • teens are manipulative. power seeking little beasts who will run with any amount of power they think they have. I know it would be easier to just give up but please don't. It is when they test you that they need you the most. I would not put up with any of this shit. My older kids are 23, 18, and 15 so I feel you. If they leave without permission call and report them as a run away. Scare them straight! Call juvenile justice center in your area and make an apt to "scare the straight" You can arrange a tour of where the will end up if they keep their shit up. Invite CSB into your home and have them there when your kids get home from school. Have those people tell them the real deal about lying about abuse, let them know they can and will be removed from your home and Foster care can be their worst nightmare. Stay strong Mamma! If all else fails get a big f-ing stick!
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 10:12 PM on Apr. 22, 2009

  • I would be calling the cops and asking for advise. This serves 2 purposes. One, you will get helpful advice, and maybe even an officer to come over to "talk" to your kids. You know, put a little fear of real life in them. The other thing is that YOU are calling them first, putting them "on alert", in the event he calls with some story....they're already aware, and you'll get a fair shake.
    EireLass

    Answer by EireLass at 9:22 PM on Apr. 22, 2009

  • omg I an not sure. my kids are under ten still. I'm not looking forward to the teen years. I know that I was a handfull back then. I can only imagine what mine will put me through. um good luck with that. LOL sorry I can't help you!
    rachel0226

    Answer by rachel0226 at 9:24 PM on Apr. 22, 2009

  • i never raised my kids to be like this. i dont know what is going on and i have never abused them. i just dont know what to do, i think sometimes it would be easier to let them go and see that its not that easy to be out in the world
    jodi205

    Answer by jodi205 at 9:25 PM on Apr. 22, 2009

  • I was the same way, they are just bluffing. they are trying to make you give in and let them do what they want. Dont give in! when they are older they will thank you. I am only 20 but I realize now that my dad had rules because he loved me, and I am thankful for that.
    mommyBrooke849

    Answer by mommyBrooke849 at 9:27 PM on Apr. 22, 2009

  • I would ask if he wanted me to dial the number for him, they are just trying to see how much stuff they can get away with, and when they tell you that they cant wait till they move out id say something like you're counting the days, im only gonna be 21 here shortly, i remember my teen years and how ungrateful I was until i was out on my own... its just a phase im sorry they are putting you through hell and back
    Breezy1988

    Answer by Breezy1988 at 9:38 PM on Apr. 22, 2009

  • Your teens are pushing their limits with you to see how far they can go and what they can get away with. You need to push back or you will never gain control in your home with them again.
    When they get angry and call you "abusive" tell them they have no idea what abusive is. Then find the services in your area that will give you printed information on child abuse for you to present to your children. Let them know what it really is. Perhaps you can even arrange for them to meet with an officer who can tell them about some child abuse cases they have come across.
    If your teens threaten to call on you for abuse, then hand them the phone with the phone number and offer to dial for them. Tell them that you would be more than happy to pack their clothes in a garbage bag, but that is all they get to take with them because everything else belongs to you.
    (con't)
    PrydferthMenyw

    Answer by PrydferthMenyw at 9:43 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • (con't)
    If they ever want to know how "wonderful" they will be treated in a foster home, have them talk to me. Of course, I wasn't abused anymore, but I never had love and I was pressured to move out as soon as I was 18.
    You can also let them know of all they have that abused children don't have. If they don't see it that way then take everything out of their rooms except for their mattress and their clothes. For meals, be sure you serve only the basic food groups that are good for them - no junk food or sweets or fancy made meals. By law, all you have to provide is a roof over their head, clothing, and food. Let that sink into their heads.
    See, I have a 15 y/o daughter who pulls this crap on me and my husband got fed up and we finally called her bluff. We did everything I suggested above and she now never dares to say I'm an abusive mother or threatens to call CPS on me, because she knows we'll call them ourselves.
    PrydferthMenyw

    Answer by PrydferthMenyw at 9:48 AM on Apr. 23, 2009