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just venting about being a SAHM

i miss work so much, not the people but just the adult interaction and conversation, somethimes i envy my husband he admitted to me that somthime he takes to long way home just to get his head together before he gets home, that kinda pissed me off, i mean when do i get my break?

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Asked by Anonymous at 4:49 AM on Apr. 23, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (8)
  • know the feeling. plan fun outings for you and the kid(s) it makes life interesting. Like field trips, make lil picnic lunches and such.

    Answer by Bugsmommy1908 at 4:54 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • i know what you mean. i'm a SATM too. the other day my hubby, my two boys and i went to el torito for an early dinner (5:30-happy hour!). i could not help but remember how fun they were and that i miss them! i haven't gone to happy hour for over 6 years!

    Answer by nairda at 4:58 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • When your SO is home leave the kids with him and go out alone or meet up with friends you need that intreaction with others. GL

    Answer by raemommy at 5:38 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • This is a refrain that a lot of moms are singing. Can I tell you that when our children were coming up, this song was not heard. It was understood that mothers who stayed home and dads who worked had separate and distinct roles in the family. That is not to say that the dads did not help out from time to time, but they did it because they wanted to and not because it was demanded of them. Somewhere this idea of needing breaks has crept into our society. We did not live near our families, and my husband often worked 12-14 hours a day. He did that so that I could be home and so that our children did not have to be in daycare. I wonder if part of the reason your husband takes the long way home is because he dreads coming home to the song's refrain. The time with our children passes very quickly. Your marriage is for a lifetime. If you can change the atmosphere in your home, you will probably get more help.

    Answer by NannyB. at 7:55 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • I hear ya momma. Being a SAHM isn't for everyone. By the time my DH gets home I need him and his help. That would piss me off too. After my DH stayed home for a day with the boys (who are 13 months and almost 5 years) he understands what I got through and helps the minute he walks in the door. Just talk to him. Tell him how you feel about it. Hopefully he will understand. I started a neighborhood playgroup in our subdivision. We meet once a week and the kids play while we chat it up. We also try to have a ladies game night about once a month or so. It helps get some adult interaction and you get to know people. Good luck.

    Answer by MommaM2 at 9:19 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • I know that you might not understand what Nanny B is saying, but shes got a good point. At some point, it becomes about the needs of your child and WHY youre at home to begin with. I have been a sahm for 13 yrs. So many times I just needed someone to talk to and tell me they understood, but never never did I wish to NOT be with my child. Not saying that you feel that way, but theres nothing wrong with speaking up and saying..hey, I am going to plan to go out with X on Friday night. We don't have anything going on, right? Plan in advance a night out. I regularly go out with friends or sometimes by myself. My kids are not a babysitting job for dad. He does his work, I do my stuff at home and then our kids are mutual common ground. When he comes in the door, don't dump the kids on him or expect him to just take over while you rest. More than anything....this is a place of constant communication. The sacrifice your making is huge.

    Answer by momofsaee at 9:46 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • I feel ya but this is a double edged sword. At times I cannot wait to get to my office as I have had all the baby drama I can stand for one weekend, but the minute I get here I have guilt that I am away from them...uhhhh mothers guilt! We just can't win can we? I am home a lot in the winter because I manage the office of a contractor who does swimming pool installations, but come May through Oct I am gone sometimes 55-60 hrs a week. It sucks.

    Answer by salexander at 11:29 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • everything we (men, women, mothers, fathers) do is a sacrifice if we are trying to do the right thing, live fulfilling lives, and/or raise healthy children. we just can't expect to have our cake and eat it too. EVERYTHING becomes boring if you're doing it day after day even when we are doing what we love. i love staying home with my children and my husband loves his job but we both get burned out. it's normal...and there is nothing wrong with voicing one's frustrations.

    Answer by nairda at 3:25 PM on Apr. 24, 2009

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