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BM drama

Ok so me and my SO have been together for about 3 years. We have a precious 16 month old son together and he has a 8 year  oldughter from a  from a previous marriage. Well their daughter is in softball for the season so we have to see each other a few times every week. Well in their case, his ex wife had a affair on him so they got a divorced. Anyhoo, she is a complete b****to me at all times.  Apparently the other night at practice after I left, she told some of the other mothers that I was the reason why they got divorced...HOWEVER the divorce was finalized in the BEGINNIG of 2006 and I did not have my son until the END of 2007 ( december) ... AND she got married to the man she had the affair with MARCH of 2007 and they were engaged for 7 months before the actual wedding. IT just pisses me off that she is trying to make me look bad when its really her!!!! damn it...LOL

Answer Question
 
nat1981

Asked by nat1981 at 8:38 AM on Apr. 23, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 3 (8 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • If I were you ( me being who I am) this is what I would do. Just don't speak to her...Just let her and everyone else see what they are missing out on. Like if you are better looking and in better shape than she is.. flaunt it. not too skanky..but a classy/sexy. Are you and your SO getting married? I'm sure that would really piss her off. but anyway be the good little housewife and mother that she is not. Just show her up. BE BETTER THAN HER. I am that way with my sister in law. I always get the feeling she thinks she is better than me. So I do everything in my power to one up her. I know it sounds pety but It gives me joy to just see her pissed off and irritated.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:46 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • I used to feel like you about the same thing after years have gone by it really doesn't matter so to buy you some time and pain, just kill her with kindness that will eat her up.
    And never let her see you feeling down or let her know that she is getting to you. Let her talk bad about you as long as you and dh know the truth. By her talking bad about you is making her look bad all the others moms will get sick of her talking about the same thing. You just live your happy life with your son and dh and everything else will fall into place. Just ignore. Oh and anything that has to do with their daughter do not get involved let them work it out. It will only cause friction between you and dh. Believe me I have been there done that. GL
    Butterfly1108

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 8:48 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • why cant women just say yeahh thats my x husbands new wife or soon to be wife. and leave it at that why go into detail i bet this other mom didnt even ask i asume bm just brought it up. i know my x has an x wife and she was "hight socity" she had money and a good job pta all that well shes now in jail AGAIN for embezzlement 1/2 a million THIS time. now her "friends" know who she really is. i was also the new flavor of the month as she would say even after 7 years. i would nicely walk up to her next time and say something to her and even better if it was in ear shot of someone that way she will know you know what shes up to and to just knock it off and grow up and move on. good luck hun xo
    tabbys4

    Answer by tabbys4 at 8:51 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • I like what the 1st anon said.
    KARRIEMARIE

    Answer by KARRIEMARIE at 9:09 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • Just kill her with kindness. She is probably just trying to get a reaction out of you. Don't stoop to her level.

    Christine0813

    Answer by Christine0813 at 9:27 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • I like what Anon said too. Just don't make it into an issue. You don't need to add fuel to the fire, especially when you have his child indirectly involved. That poor kid is going to get in the middle, which is not fair for her. Be the more mature person, look past it. Unfortunately, you'll be connected to her, if you stick with your SO, and you have to be able to cohabitate.
    ap9902

    Answer by ap9902 at 9:28 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • Let it slide. Be the best step mother that child could ever ask for. Be fun and supportive, know your boundaries, and continue to go to every game and practice. Show people the real you and don't react to anything she says or does. Hopefully, when she realizes that you are there for the long haul or that she can't faze you, she will cut her childish behavior.
    Mom1Stepmom1

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 9:41 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • Blow her high school drama off, I would not giver her the satisfaction that she is getting to me. You don't have to defend yourself to the other moms. We can usually tell who is the looney and who is not just by their actions.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 11:23 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • I say just be cool. Be nice to the other moms, and have conversations with them about other things. Be friendly with them and if they ever bring it up then you can say something. Like if one of them were to say "Gee, it must be hard to be around your SO's ex all the time" say "Yeah, she really broke his heart back then. Good thing I came along after the fact and put him back together. It makes me sad that someone could hurt someone I care about so much" and leave it at that. They don't need details. If they are friendly with her, eventually they'll see that she's a liar in their own time. Don't drag them into your drama, just be cool. Time will fix it.
    beckcorc

    Answer by beckcorc at 11:49 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

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