Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

At what age do you stop?

I mean cleaning up after your kids and putting their laundry away. I hang up the clothes and fold them, but make them put it away. Problem is I go upstairs and its in piles around the room. I know some parents who put everything away and STILL clean their DCs rooms. My DS is 13 and my DD is almost 9 and Ill tell ya what, I am tired of cleaning their room and then A DAY later its trashed again!!! For DS I just let it go. As long as their arent dishes and garbage, he can walk on crap all day long. But I am tired of it and plan on laying down the law this weekend. I am tired of both of them saying its clean and then find everything in corners or under beds!!!!! Seriously I rarely go upstairs anymore cause it just makes me so angry!!!

Answer Question

Asked by jajumommy2000 at 8:50 AM on Apr. 23, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 5 (99 Credits)
Answers (47)
  • they r pletny old enough to clean the rooms themselves. i was cleaning mine at 6! the 13 year old is also old enough to do his laundry. if they refuse or "clean" it. they r grounded no ifs ands or buts. its their room they live there they made the mess they can clean it up. if they dont they get nothing but food and potty time. no tv no fone no outside no goin anywhere. nothing. if u give allowance take it away until they clean. or if they thuroughly clean their rooms give them lik $5...thatll get them motivated. if they still dont. they go to skool come home do hw and nothing after that, no comp, tv, fone, outside, freinds. they r cut off from the world.

    Answer by xhellxfirex495 at 8:54 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • I would put a stop to it right now for both of them. Eventhough your DD is 9 she is old enough to understand she must keep a clean room and help with chores. It teaches them a sense of responsibility. Sit them down tonight and make a list of rules that they must follow and if they are not followed everyday, then they will not get to do whatever it is they like to do. My husband was a very clean child because his mother always told him that he will help his wife with housework and not just let her be the one to do it. and let me tell you he is very supportive. He doesn't do as much as I do but he does what he can. I am a stay at home mom and he works full time at a steel company. My children are 3 and 17 months. My 3 year old cleans his room and cleans his toys out of the floor where ever they are. and my 17 month old has also started helping. They know mama likes to keep a clean house. my 3 year old likes to help putting cont.

    Answer by 2wndrfl_btrflys at 8:55 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • Well, my daughter is 7. I feel like i started chores a lil late, but I'm working on it. I let HER pic what type of chore she wants to do. I still do all her laundry though. But, she has gotten great at vacuuming, & moping. If i give her some pledge & a rag, she'll dust all day. She also loves cleaning windows, & wiping cabinets down. Anything that she can spray & wipe, she loves. She DOES have a hard time cleaning her room though. She just stands there & says "i don't know what to do" so i show her, then next thing ya know I've picked it all up. I say "can you not see the trash on the floor, is it invisible to you?" But at least she makes up for it by helping me clean OTHER parts of the house. Baby steps i guess.......


    Answer by samurai_chica at 8:56 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • clothes in the washing machine and dryer. so 9 and 13 is old enough to know that mama doesn't need to be doing everything and can use some help. if they have a room of their own then they need to pitch in and keep it clean and clothes put away. good luck

    Answer by 2wndrfl_btrflys at 8:57 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • were you at my house last night? lol. my dd age 11 will get a list on what i want doen ( have to do a list ) but will say pick up floor clean underbeds throw out trash pick up clothes if there clean flod and put away if dirty put them in laundry. and i get im done well did u? yup. im checking. ok. sure enough only one thing was done. and i end up sitting up there while shes doing it. seems the only was it gets done and it sucks. we wont mention the snack wrappers i find ( she sneaks them! ) and i have told her just do all this or i have to go up there and then i see and find ---and i get mad. even her 3 year old brother cleans his mess. so hun your not alone xo and i feel for you xo

    Answer by tabbys4 at 8:57 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • Thanks, I told my DD that if it doesnt get clean soon they would both be sleeping in the living room cause they dont deserve the room!!!! I have DS do his laundry every once in awhile but for some reason he is afraid of the basement!! He thinks its haunted, lol. DD does do the vacuuming and she also loves to dust! They are in charge of the garbage and taking ot out on trash day. DD does recycling and DS does regular. DS also does dishes sometimes. Its really their rooms that are the cause of my gray hair, lol.

    Answer by jajumommy2000 at 9:00 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • you are right they are old enough, My DD is 10 and she does the exact same thing I will give her clothes to put away then find them in the floor or in the dirty laundry still folded up so I said fine you can do your own laundry I wash and dry it and put it in a basket on her bed and she has to fold it and put it up she got super mad because she had to wear wrinkled clothes to school since she never folded them LOL. anyways I think its just a pre-teen puberty thing.

    Answer by gonnahavababy at 9:16 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • I'm hoping that by teaching my son now (he is a year old) to pick up, I will prevent a problem like that from arising. maybe grounding them to their room till they pick up their messes would work? I know that worked on me!

    Answer by MythicMMM at 9:22 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • My boys are seven and four and I have them clean up after themselves. They only thing I still do for them is putting away the laundry. I will start them on dishes when eight and my seven year old helps daddy with the garbage. They don't get to play, watch T.V. etc. until they are done doing what needs to be.


    Answer by Christine0813 at 9:24 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • I feel ya! My kids are 14, 11, 7 and 3, and I started making the two oldest do their own laundry. The teenager throws everything into the washer and does not sort any of them and the tween just picks up dirty clothes off the floor to wear them because she never gets it done. They think they are allergic to work or something. Starting them young is a good thing. I do the laundry, but they are supposed to put it away and hang stuff up. I went in my 11 yr olds room and everythng was in the floor. We don't know if its clean, dirty or somewhere in between. I think its time to stop doing it all for them. If you don't like it, then close the door. I just don't have the time to clean their rooms.

    Answer by momofsaee at 9:31 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in General Parenting
BM drama

Next question overall (Pregnancy)
BH Contractions...