Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

boys night out?

do you let your husband have a boys night out? i went out the other night for an hour to get something to eat with a friend, my husbands in the military and so far i have only met one wife thats why i went out to make a friend kinda thing, he wants to go out for the whole night, and come home shitfaced. i said no you have a daughter to come home and spend time with. he thinks im wrong, but i said he can go just not all night and i dont want him to come home shitfaced, am i being unreasonable?????

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:45 AM on Apr. 23, 2009 in Just for Fun

Answers (20)
  • I think you could find some middle ground. How about he can go once every other week and get shitfaced and he can go once or twice every week and not all night or come home drunk? Did that make any sense? :p

    Answer by Ati_13 at 11:47 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • I think just because you have a child does not mean that you also have to lose your whole self. Sure, going out every night and staying out until 2am is a no-go, but that doesn't mean he (or you) can't go out once in awhile and have a good time with friends. When a new parent is "not allowed" to do something because of the baby, it tends to develop resentment toward the child, mother (or father) and the whole situation. There has to be compromise somewhere. Talk it out and come to a mutual agreement, so that all parties involved are happy.

    Answer by LKRA at 11:47 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • Ugh. We used to live on Ft Hood. He's out the military now, but anyway, yea I made friends with one of his friends wives. Never again.
    but anyway, thats off topic.
    Everyone needs time away sometimes. Even men. Does he go out all the time and leave you home alone? Your response to me was pretty reasonable. Atleast you weren't trying to control him or tell him he couldn't go. What was his response to what you said?

    Answer by babycakes254 at 11:49 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • yes you are.... he needs to go out and let off some steam.. i let mine go.. its not like hez out cheatn on ya.. so what if he comes home shitfaced, make his hangover day hell if ya want.. but dont be all "he has a kid and a wife and noone else does"...

    Answer by HottMamaRossx2 at 11:50 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • i tried to reason with him he just wont budge, i mean i dont care that he goes out for a few hours, but i really dont think he needs to get shitfaced.... he gets stupid drunk, falls down hes busted his head open from being drunk and falling, i dont want him to come home and be like that. i mean, like i said a few hours fine, but not till 2am, if i wanted to stay out all night hed be pissed, and would flip a bitch if i tried to stay out all night. but either way i just dont think he has to stay out all night and get shitfaced drunk but he thinks he should, and he does go out with friends, he just never went out for more than a few hours after work, but all the sudden he wants to. and he never comes home drunk cause he knows how stupid he gets. but all the sudden something changed

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:52 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • No way hubby needs to not go out especially to bar , bad idea! Mine did this once and almost died 3 times from alcohol covered in pike! bad example to be the head of the house. !bars are a no brainer! think about it...

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:54 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • I agree with previous post. So many parents just say, "okay I am a parent," and let there happiness and life fall by the wayside. I dont think that gives cause to go out and get trashed all the time, but once or twice a month is fine.
    My husband is in the military, and has gone out every now and then with friends. He works so hard, and the relationship that he has with his guys is something that I cannot understand, or duplicate. Drinking can be a way of self medicating, especially for service members, they can get lose and say things to one another that they cant to us. Having faith in him and your relationship by allowing him the chance to hang out with friends and cut loose can actually strengthen the trust that you two have for one another.
    I know that my drinking days or over, and I would rather spend time with my daughter, but it is unfair of me to ask my husband to reciprocate just because I dont want to do that.

    Answer by 2-1CavWife at 11:54 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • I don't have a prob with hub going out, even if he stays out till 2am, but he's responsible, he doesnt' drink and drive and he doesnt' do it often, hell he's had "boys" weekends, he and his friends went to Vegas a couple of weeks ago for a gamers convention, but I've done the same thing. We don't have issues with that

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 11:55 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • tell him you will call his mom if he starts this up! She will give it to him!!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:56 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

  • i never said that he couldnt go because he has a kid and wife, i just dont want him to come home shitfaced wake my daughter up and her see him all stupid and falling down......and i dont think theres a need to get shitfaced....i tried to reason with him he wont budge, and i didnt say he couldnt go i just dont want him to go out all night and be stupid drunk when he gets home thats all. and babycakes254, why wouldnt you make friends with the wives ever again? is it a bad idea to do so?

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:57 AM on Apr. 23, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.