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Do you consider talking to someone other than a spouse cheating?

My husband was talking to a woman who I considered my friend and did this for over a month behind my back. He states they never meet, but talked about going out. He says this is not cheating, It's been almost a year and I still cannot get over this. I feel like I am going crazy. I have no family here and his family knew about it all along. I feel totally betrayed by everyone. I don't know what to do.

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:49 PM on Apr. 24, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • DH says this is absolutley cheating and not right. This is a emotional affair and a physical affair in the making.

    Answer by SusieD250 at 11:50 PM on Apr. 24, 2009

  • yep that's cheating IMO. if you portray that you're available or that you're willing to be with someone else, then that's cheating.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:51 PM on Apr. 24, 2009

  • Since he did it behind your back and it really upset you....yes.
    I do have a guy friend that my dh is also friends with and I let my dh know when I talk to him...that way he doesn't get upset. You have to be open and honest.

    Answer by army_wife2000 at 11:54 PM on Apr. 24, 2009

  • In that context yes.. there was intent to cheat. Whenever something is "covered up" or kept from your partner then you are in the wrong. He spoke to her for a year without you knowing.. He didn't tell you because he KNEW it was wrong! How does he expect you to believe it was as innocent as a phone call?!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:57 PM on Apr. 24, 2009

  • no. It wasn't nice but it wasn't cheating imho

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:00 AM on Apr. 25, 2009

  • It's an emotional affair. I consider that cheating. If there was nothing wrong with their relationship, than they wouldn't have hidden it from you.

    Answer by LolosMom at 12:08 AM on Apr. 25, 2009

  • I read somewhere that the number one reason men cheat is actually because they dont get enough emotional support in their current relationship...... you have a baby so this is easy to understand. Try having a more open relationship. Tell him he is your man and pump up his ego in any way you know how. I do this as best as I can for my guy in hopes that he wont do the same thing you are talking about.

    is it cheating? technically no, but I would go with you and never forget it and think of it as cheating

    Answer by HunnysFarAway at 12:27 AM on Apr. 25, 2009

  • It's the worst kind of cheating. It's emotional cheating. I was friends with a guy who was married and his wife hated me. He was emotionally cheating on her with me b/c he kept our friendship a secret. The fact that he hid it shows guilt, so he knew it was wrong. Follow your gut.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:34 AM on Apr. 25, 2009

  • I think is is. Rather it is emotional, or physical, its cheating. And the fact that he hid it from you is even worse. He should have been honest with you. Him doing that seems like he doesn't respect you.

    Answer by ZammiesMommy at 3:07 AM on Apr. 25, 2009

  • Heck ya he was being sneaky behind your back talking to another women.he should have invested his "extra" time in the romance between you and him.I would never trust my man again if he did that to me.And as far as your friend.Boot her ass to the curb-shes a no keeper honey I have a few friends and none would have done that .If my man would have tried then they would call me up and say I dont know how to say this but honey he is trying to chat me up girl. Think about it if your dh friend was talking to you like that ,would you feel good about it,or know its wrong.

    Answer by MRSBUSYMOM at 4:39 AM on Apr. 25, 2009

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