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How do you explain why it is not ok to lie to a 5 year old?

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Asked by 2youngones at 9:50 PM on Apr. 25, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (11)
  • depends on what kind of lie you're talking about here...

    Answer by mama_moonsong at 9:51 PM on Apr. 25, 2009


    Answer by 2mothershelpers at 9:52 PM on Apr. 25, 2009

  • well one thing that might be helpful is to explain that since YOU don't lie to your child, it's not fair if they lie to you....give examples like "remember when I told you I would take you to the park? What if when it was time to go I told you I wasn't really going to take you?"....something that they will understand might help make them understand... that's a hard one though. When my stepson was 5 he went through a short (thankfully!) lying phase and it was very frustrating. This obviously isn't something you can use positive reinforcement for because it's not like you can reward them everytime they say something that ISN'T a lie.... we sat ours down and explained very thoroughly that lying is against the rules and that if he lies he will be punished. And we followed through. He seems to be past it now! good luck!!

    Answer by stepmom929 at 9:54 PM on Apr. 25, 2009

  • Just try to explaine it on their level. Maybe say that when they make someone believe something that really is not true than that's a lie and it's not very nice. If mommy told you, that you could have ice-cream if you eat all your dinner and then I did not give you ice-cream after you ate all your dinner then that would be a lie and that would not be very nice. lol

    Answer by geminisummerz at 10:00 PM on Apr. 25, 2009

  • with my son i make examples(tel him stories of tell thing the truth oand one lying andask which is better) he knows not to lie or not tell the truth.

    Answer by IMAMOM2-2KIDS at 3:10 AM on Apr. 26, 2009

  • It is all about trust.

    Answer by rkoloms at 10:39 AM on Apr. 26, 2009

  • You know I had a hard time explaining to my little one too.. You know what helped so much?? You might laugh but Veggie Tale Movies.. I loved them from the first time I saw them. They are just so cute and you really don't have to be that religion to watch them but they do learn what lying is and why they shouldn't do it.. My little one has learned a lot from them and even explains things to her older cousins now.. She's only 4 but she picked up on the messages they're trying to get across.
    It might be worth a try...

    Answer by Halsmommy at 11:01 AM on Apr. 26, 2009

  • Kids lie, it is normal, but instead of pointing out the "lie" point out how he is not telling you the truth. For example, he throws a ball in the house and it knocks over a lamp (which you saw happen) , when you ask what happens and he says "johnny did it", which we know is a lie say "well that can't be the truth, because I saw you throw it, would you like to tell me the truth?" If he at that point tells you what really happened, then keep the punishment light, maybe a reprimand about not throwing the ball. But if he keeps up with the untruth for at least 2 more "Tell me the truths" then he needs to have a punishment that fits the untruth, at this point leaving the ball out of the equation. I hope that is making sense it is what I use with my kids and it has really worked.. This can apply to any occasion, it doesn't have to be something you witnessed only. I hope it helped!

    Answer by luckysevenwow at 11:40 AM on Apr. 26, 2009

  • One thing that's good is the story "The Boy Who Cried Wolf". You can tell them that when you tell people things that aren't true, they're going to find out. Then, they aren't going to believe anything you say, and that's going to make you sad, because sometimes you really need people to believe you.

    Then, as bad as it sounds, if the lying is REALLY bad, and I mean REALLY REALLY bad, and NOTHING else seems to work, you can try a variation of Bill Cosby's method. He tells the story of how his ds used to lie. One day, he told his ds that they needed to talk about what he was lying about, but that he wasn't going to spank him for it. At the end of the talk about why it was wrong, as his son was walking away, he swatted his butt. His ds was like - "why did you do that - you said you weren't going to spank me!" He responded, "I lied. It doesn't feel good and makes you not trust the person. Now do you see why it's wrong?"

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 2:03 AM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • A five-year old shouldn't have any problems comprehending what telling the truth is. Our 2 and 3 year olds know. Give some examples and use each situation to teach it.

    And OBVIOUSLY, don't lie to your child. If you do, there's no point in even bothering explaining it to them. Unless you're asking for forgiveness. Kids mimic whatever their parents do, so make sure you're being truthful too. :)

    Answer by fluud7 at 7:30 AM on Apr. 27, 2009

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