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I want another baby but afraid I won't love it as much as my son.

I have a wonderful son. I think he has a higher IQ than me he is 2 1/2 speaks in 5 word sentences doctor told me he is very much ahead. He is fully potty trained other than nights, and just the sweetest little boy. He loves animals and other kids and is very gentle and understanding. He has always been an easy baby, which everyone I know keeps telling me and hubby we are lucky. Now we want another kid but afraid it won't compare to our son now, and afraid we would favor our son. We know if it was a girl we would be fine, but if it is a boy we will probably compare we feel. Has anyone else felt this way? Is it normal to feel this way? I feel kinda harsh just writing this.

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ladyluck09

Asked by ladyluck09 at 10:44 PM on Apr. 25, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (8)
  • You sound normal to me. I have only one son who is a bit over two. I think it would be hard not to compare him with a brother. But, you will love each completely for their own individual wonderfulness.
    timelessglass

    Answer by timelessglass at 10:48 PM on Apr. 25, 2009

  • I've never understood when people say this. You will love your second, third, fourth just as much as your first, believe me. You will find things about the second that is better than the first, and you will love them for those unique things. As soon as you hold that second baby, and bond with it, it will be a bond that can not be broken. Then you will think, how silly you were to ask this question! I have heard several people say that though when they were pregnant with their second...But relax it will be love at first sight!!!!!!:)
    pamelajqs

    Answer by pamelajqs at 10:49 PM on Apr. 25, 2009

  • i understand your anxiety but you should compare your kids. to themselves or other kids. i mean it gives your kids a complex. and as far as you being afraid you won't love your second child as much as the first is just crazy. you need to learn to share the love and split the attention between the two. your a mother use that mothers intuition. what is that telling. is it telling you to have another baby or not.
    and i am not bashing you here or anything..i am happy that you have a bright son and all.. but i can't stand it when mothers say "my baby was the best baby in the world" "he is so much more ahead then anyone else his age. it's just not right. i mean praise your kids for being smart and everything but you make other mothers feel bad when you do things like that. i am all for being a proud mama and all but good grief you are gonna make your son feel like he always have to do this stuff to make you happy in life.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:51 PM on Apr. 25, 2009

  • YOU WILL
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:56 PM on Apr. 25, 2009

  • We didn't know how smart our son was till we took him to the doc. he is the first kid we had and my hubby and I are the youngest so we were never around other babies. To be honest we always thought all babies were that way. Doc is the one who told us not to expect any other children we have to be this smart. which in turned kinda scares us, because we don't know what a baby should act like now. But with the smart comes trouble he has figured out stuff that is child safe. He is a bit too confident at times, not perfect just smart. So I am not bashing any moms either and nor did I mean for it to come out that way.
    ladyluck09

    Answer by ladyluck09 at 10:57 PM on Apr. 25, 2009

  • Trust me, I have 5 sons, and with every son, my little heart grew more and more. I love them all the same...yet differently, but just as much...you dig? :)
    mamofive

    Answer by mamofive at 11:12 PM on Apr. 25, 2009

  • I agree with pamelajqs. Why would you even say something like that? Every child is different and you love them differently than your first, second, and third.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:15 PM on Apr. 25, 2009

  • For those bashing..her question is normall!

    I have 7 kids, 4 boys and 3 girls and one on the way. And with each kid I wondered if my heart would have enough room....it does! Right now you look at your little guy and wonder "can any one else be so perfect?" and they are, but in thier own unique way.

    An example, my oldest has/had a severe speech delay, and now at the age of 17 we are learning he is bi-polar, know compare that to the three directly under his age who are very bright and one is an excellent athlete, and even though my oldest is the most challenging I love him no less then I love my others. You will love your next child, you will love who THEY are, you will love them for just being a part of you.
    luckysevenwow

    Answer by luckysevenwow at 11:29 AM on Apr. 26, 2009

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