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how to tell mom to butt out.

ok I am 34 soon to be divorced. my mother was staying with me to help with the kids. i have started dating. Nothing too serious but met a guy that i liked. My mother messed up the thing with this guy cause she said some things she should not had said. only been seeing the man for a week. Now all he wants to be is friends.
This is not the first man i have lost because of stupid shit my mother has said or done. I lost another cause of her about a month ago. I love her but she is being too nosey. I tell her what i do is not any of her business and she gets mad. JUst yesterday i yelled at her for getting in my business and she stormed out like a 2 yr old. I have tolerated it this long because she is my mother and babysitter but after this i found a sitter to watch my kids. So what should i do about my mom. too damn nosey. How do i get her to mind her own business and let me handle mine. I dont tell her how to live.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:44 AM on Apr. 27, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • Move out on your own then she won't have so much say
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:47 AM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • hmmm u need your own space/place! how does mom do thhis???lost
    2mothershelpers

    Answer by 2mothershelpers at 2:48 AM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • i am on my own. She was living with me. i pay the bills and everything else. HOw do i get her to move out.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:48 AM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • Quit using your mom and get a job and a place of your own. Or better yet, live with your mom and treat her with the respect she deserves and forget about a man for now. Grow up.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:52 AM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • Tell her she needs to move out. There's no easy way to say it
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:55 AM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • Have a sit down. Reassure her that you love her, that she's your mother and nothing can change that but the living arrangements are just not working out. Appreciate that she has your best interest at heart(to her she does) but you need to be your own woman doing things how and when you want without interference. Look into someone needing roomates, that way she's not alne and possibly find someone her own age to hang with. Just try to keep from being isulting or putting her down to harsh. Keep her intregity intact and find a common ground, go from there! Once you two are on the same page you will reach her!!! Good luck.
    ladyd6280

    Answer by ladyd6280 at 2:56 AM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • to annoymous 252 am
    my mother i love her but she has no job i am supporting her. i have a job and the woman left me for a child molester when i was young so i do treat her rite. i treat her better than she treats me.
    I work long hrs and take care of her my kids and everything else so dont get an attitude with me.
    I left a controling husband i will not have a controlling mother. but thank u for ur opinion and i am grown up.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:02 AM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • I'm not trying to be rude but how can you have someone do you the favor of moving in with you to help you with your kids...but then pick and choose what areas of your life they can and can't be a part of? She's your mom, not an employee. It's hard to live with someone and work to help someone but then butt out when you see them make choices you don't agree with (I have no idea if your choices are good or bad. That's not the point.).

    If you really want your privacy, you're going to have to ask her to move out. Right now, she's trying to have your best interest in mind but also the children whom she is helping care for. You've made your kids her business and I'm sure she's also thinking about how your relationships might impact your children.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:05 AM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • To annoymous 256 am she has friends and has told me on many occasions when she and i have had our arguements that she would move into her friends house. i told her please go. but she always returns. my mother is 50 yrs old and has always had songmeone taking care of her. she has never stood on her own two feet. I love that she wanted to help but i am tired of her now. She has never grown up herself. Everything ive gotten is by my own doing. This is the only help i have ever asked of my mother. She was never one i could trust. I am now seeing it again i guess. once a disappointment always a disappointment.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:06 AM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • I think you should cont. to honer your mother by helping her in any way she needs it-God Bless!
    2mothershelpers

    Answer by 2mothershelpers at 1:58 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

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