• In the Spotlight:
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What do i tell her??

My sisters boyfriend has always been a bad guy for her,



1. he is still married to his first wife.

2. he has two children he doesnt take care of

3. he has anger management problems



and now he is being rude to me. i have tried to talk to my friend about it but i always seem to sugarcoat the fact that i think he is a jerk and she could do so much better than him. he is no good and me and her mother know it. he has openly dissrespected her whole family and now me and her brother as well but she is very soft spoken and wont stick up for herself. how do i tell her to leave him without messing with our relationship.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:36 AM on Apr. 27, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • Tell her staight up that this guy is a loser and open her eyes up before it's to late. Sugarcoating anything is'nt gonna help her any. If she gets mad at you then so be it being a true friend is looking out for the ones you care for. If something happens how are you gonna feel if you did nothing. Speak up girl before something happens..GL
    raemommy

    Answer by raemommy at 11:41 AM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • The bottom line is she is the one that is going to have to make the decision to leave. No amount of advice and foot stomping is going to make her leave him if she doesn't want to. Maybe exam why she would want to be with someone like that who would disrespect his family, children, and her family. Does she want that for her children one day? If I were you I would make myself scarce. If she asks why you haven't been around lately tell her. " I really dont like ________." If she asks why, tell her, "He is married and dating you, he doesn't take care of his children, he is disrespectful to your family as well." If she says that it doesn't matter what you think. Tell her she is right, but that you dont have to be around that either. Lets see if she is really as good of a friend to you, as you are to her.
    2-1CavWife

    Answer by 2-1CavWife at 11:43 AM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • I was in the same situation as your friend when I was 25. My family told me repeatedly that he wasn't a good guy but I didn't listen. Something happened between us and I finally realized what a major jerk he was. I broke up with him and now I'm married to someone who loves me for who I am and my family absolutely loves him!

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:44 AM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • Point out the flaws, help her realize that what he's doing to his wife and kids he'll do to ANY female he's involved with!!! Team up with mom if you have to but as if you were trying to save her not force her to do it, cuz ultimately she has to decide when t take out the trash!!!
    ladyd6280

    Answer by ladyd6280 at 11:55 AM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • You can't tell her, she will figure it out on her own. That is how we get our experience.
    pattigioeli

    Answer by pattigioeli at 12:28 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • You can tell her all you want. Whats that going to do ? Lert her figure it out on her own.
    aMbeR012005

    Answer by aMbeR012005 at 12:58 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.