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Is it wrong for people to openly talk about a person with a serious illness?

My best friend of 12 years just found out that she has a tumor in her brain. She just turned 22 y/o on the day of my wedding. I love this girl like a sister, and she has been having a hard time dealing with the news. It isn't cancer, but it is growing in size, and she doesn't have insurance bc of her job. She has been trying to get assistance, because now they took her liscense and laid her off from work. She has no way to pay for her bills, and the longer she waits, the bigger her tumor gets. She is a fairly private person, and didn't want everyone to know right away. Well, I was at her place of work, and her manager was sitting there telling everyone what was going on...complete strangers. I was ok with it, until she started telling them about her lack of insurance, and she acted all huffy bc she wasn't at work...the girl is SICK. It just really upset me & I wanted to tell that woman off, but I didn't want to upset my friend

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:26 PM on Apr. 27, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • That was very unprofessional of her manager to talk about your friends personal situation. I would report her to her superior.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:28 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • her manager falls under the privacy act when it comes to medical issues. so she had no right or reason to tell anyone else about your friends medical issues. your friend needs to tell her manager it is confidential information that she will discuss with others when and if she is ready. even if she is no longer employeed there her manager can not say anything.
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 6:29 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • That is absolutely NOT ok to do and she should get in trouble for that. Those are private, personal matters and it's NOT ok to talk about them with other people like that especially when you say she has just been laid off, that means there is a chance she could get called back to work there.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:29 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • Wow. That's a tacky boss. It's OK to discuss a person's illness openly IF it's in a neautral manner. When things get negative (such as the boss suggesting that your friend got 'huffy') the person should be there to defend themselves. My mom's friend died of cancer a while back. She talked about the disease and the effects on her friend with me. It's good to talk about things like that to get them off of your chest. But it sounds like your friend's boss was just saying stuff to be cruel.
    MommyDumDum

    Answer by MommyDumDum at 6:29 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • *OP* I didn't want to upset my friend, or cause her problems at work. But, I have known this girl for 12 years, and I know she wouldn't want complete strangers to know about all of her problems. I didn't even tell my family (her secondary family lol) until I asked her permission, and she okay-ed it. Would I have been in the wrong to tell that woman to shut up? I am just going to continue to support and love my friend, and hopefully she gets the help she needs and makes it through this. I just hope that the jerks will just keep their lips sealed and let her try to deal with this with her family and friends.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:31 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • Would I have been in the wrong to tell that woman to shut up?



    No

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:46 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • She can get state medical assistance and have that taken care of so there should be no reason to wait to have surgery. As for the boss, she's an idiot and needs to keep her mouth shut.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:55 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

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