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help me please i need people who will be honest about this question?(tubes tied or not to)

ok i will be 23 when my second baby will be born in oct 2009. and aslo have a almost 4 yo . my boyfriend will be 33 this year and our second baby is actually his first bio baby. but i want to know should i have my tubes tied or not? i mean i really dont want them tied ,because i want to have 2 more babies after this one . which will make it 4 babies in all , i want ... my boyfriend wants me to have my tubes tied or cut ,becasuse he said that he might be here to watch them all grow up because of his heart, so this will be our last baby... my mom wants me to do it , because she said that i will have enough on my plate to deal with for the next for years.. but something in my body and heart tells me not to listen to them and i should just get on birthcontrol after i deliver my oct baby.then when the time is right and we are ready i can take to have other ... i cant even type this without almost crying...please help

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:04 PM on Apr. 27, 2009 in Pregnancy

Answers (12)
  • i wouldn't do it if your not 100 percent sure you want to. its a big decision.

    Sheenalynne

    Answer by Sheenalynne at 11:06 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • Personally I would choose the birth control. You never know what will happen down the road. Don't let anybody force you into it if you truly don't want to.
    jamesmommy12

    Answer by jamesmommy12 at 11:06 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • I didn't get my tubes tied when my family pressured me to, and I am so happy that I didn't. I chose to get an IUD instead. It lasts for five years which is enough time for me to decide one way or another.
    Nathskitten

    Answer by Nathskitten at 11:10 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • I got mine tied, but mine could be reversed, it was done by clamp. For you being 23, I would suggest not doing that, when you want children with your future husband.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:14 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • I was in the same boat. My husband and I have 3 children together, and every one seems to think that this is enough children.
    In my heart, and my husbands, we could not honestly say that we were done, so I did not do it.
    I do not regret it one bit, and in the future if we want more, we still have that opportunity. (even though we are not looking for more now, our youngest is only 2 weeks old)
    I feel confident in the fact that we can be careful in the mean time and decide down the road when we are done for sure.
    NewMommyin06

    Answer by NewMommyin06 at 11:15 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • I would not do it. You need to be 100% sure before you do it. Since you are 23, I would just go on birth control. Getting a reversal is very expensive.
    My family pressured me, I did it and I regret it big time. I should not have listened to my family.
    I had mine cut and clamped, I would love to have it reversed but i don't have $6,000 laying around to get it reversed.
    Good luck!
    PoisonousBlonde

    Answer by PoisonousBlonde at 11:22 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • I agree with all the other posts if you are not 100% positive you want it done then i wouldn't. My husband and i are 25 years apart i am 23 and he is 48. I have a 4year old from a previous relationship and together we have an 11 month old and just found out i am pregnant again. He is really happy because we both want a big family, my daughter was his first bio child. I am a little worried sometimes that he is not going to be around to see his grandkids and what not but we are just enjoying the time we have together. I would not let someone tell you to do something you don't want to do, even more so if you want more kids someday. I would consider an IUD they can last anywhere from 1 to 10 years and they can always take it out if you decide to have more. The bottom line is noone can tell you what to do, but I would go with my heart, not what someone tells you to do. Good luck!
    jnsdrf

    Answer by jnsdrf at 11:30 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • IF YOUR NOT WANTING TO HAVE YOUR TUBES TIED, THEN TALK TO YOUR BOYFRIEND ABOUT HIM GETTING HIM SELF DONE THAT CAN BE REVERSED IF YOU GUYS DECIDE TO HAVE MORE...I WOULD GET YOUR TUBES TIED IF YOU KNOW IN YOUR HEART THAT ISN'T WHAT YOU WANT TO DO..AND DON'T WORRY ABOUT WHAT OTHERS SAY IT'S YOUR LIFE AND YOU BODY..I GOT MY TUBES TIED AFTER MY SET OF TWIN GIRLS.WHICH I HAVE 3 KIDS...MY REASONING ON GETTING FIXED WAS BECAUSE MY HUBBY IS TERMINALLY ILL AND DUE TO HIM BEING SO SICK I KNEW THAT IT WAS THE RIGHT THING TO DO...RAISING 3 ON MY OWN IF SOMETHING DOES HAPPEN TO HIM IS ENOUGH...BUT AFTER I HAD MY TUBES DONE FOR ABOUT A MONTH I HAD ALOT OF EMOTIONAL UPS AND DOWNS AND REGRETS BUT IT WAS SOMETHING THAT I NEEDED TO DO,SO I DID IT..MY SON WAS A TWIN AND I LOST ONE AND I HAVE TWIN GIRLS BUT WHEN I WAS PREGNANT WITH THEM THERE WAS 3 SACS..SO DEEP DOWN IN MY HEART I KNEW I DID THE RIGHT THING..ONE SET OF MULTIPLES IS ENOUGH..LOL.
    TAMMSTWINS

    Answer by TAMMSTWINS at 11:31 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • WISH YOU THE BEST WITH WHATEVER DECISION YOU MAKE..
    TAMMSTWINS

    Answer by TAMMSTWINS at 11:32 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • Most doctors will NOT tie tubes for someone as young as you are. You have to be a certain age before a lot of doctors will tie your tubes. I would wait anyway. You are so young, what if it doesn't work out with your SO and you meet someone and want children with them? You can't reverse a tubal.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:35 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

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