Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Conversation between husband and his ex wife

How would you feel if your husband had conversations with his ex wife regarding anything under the sun, and never spoke a word about it to you? Yes they have a 9yr old son together which they share joint custody with. But, these are convo's she starts with him about what she's doing over the weekend, who she's spoken to they both mutually know, etc, etc.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:34 PM on Apr. 27, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (13)
  • i think the fact that they get along is great for their child and would look at it that way. she is his ex wife for a reason, just b/c they are friendly doesn't mean they are going to fall into bed together
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 11:36 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • I know that, but, I am only finding out about the convo's they have because when she drops their son off w/us, she casually says to me, "Oh, did (my husband) tell you such and such or so and so that we talked about the other day?" And the answer is, "no, he didn't". Kind of puts me on the spot and am wondering if he can spend the time of day speaking with her about her personal things, maybe he could casually mention it to me?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:40 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • Would he like you doing the same w/ one of your ex's? Do they call each other just to talk about anything under the sun or does the call/visit have to do with the child?
    chaster

    Answer by chaster at 11:42 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • "chaster", these convo's happen when the exchange of the son happens between both of our households. My DH is polite enough to humor her by listening to her talk. It just bothers me that the conversation isn't more about the child. I think they are both at fault here- her for leading the convo about her, and him for not trying to change the subject back to their son.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:45 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • sounds to me like your pretty damn jealous
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:49 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • it just seems to me like they are making small talk. no biggie, as for him not mentioning it, its small talk, do you mention to him every time you talk to the clerk at the grocery store about the weather, or a movie coming out or something like that? if she is trying to make you jealous ignore her. but you need to realize they are adults and are acting like adults, which is a good thing not a bad thing. its good for their son that they don't just talk about him. its good for him to see that even though they aren't married they have a good relationship, my parents didn't talk to each other unless it was about one of us kids for 10 years, not exactly the type of parents i would wish on any kid
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 11:54 PM on Apr. 27, 2009

  • I was with my ex-husband for about 12 years, married for 5 of them....when we talk we discuss other things like how his classes are going or how our businesses are going. We are completely wrong as a couple and despite the fact his sometimes lack of interest in our son pisses me off we still had 12 years of being a couple and "best friends" I can't just see or speak to him on the phone and be a robot discussing only Jack and nothing else. Does that mean I want him back? Hell no! I'm happier than I've ever been with my fiance, he doesn't get jealous or pick apart my conversations with my ex, nor do I purposely bring them up and do a play-by-play for him, honestly my conversations with my ex are NONE of his business, and what your husband speaks about to his ex is really none of yours! Don't let jealously eat you up inside and ultimately put tension in your relationship over nothing!
    Mom2Jack04

    Answer by Mom2Jack04 at 12:05 AM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • its okay for exs to be friends. especially when there are children involved. I am trying to build up a friendship with my ex, and his new gf. Way he sees it, is if she loves him, shes gonna be okay with him bein friends with me, and if shes not okay with it, then she wont be around for very long.
    He knows more about me than anybody else does and vise versa. so its easy to confide in him.
    maybe its a similar situation. its nothing to worry about. its actually a GOOD thing that they have a mutual friendship.
    if it bothers you THAT much that he doesnt bring up their conversations then bring it up to him and ask him to clue you in more. :)
    trystons_mommy

    Answer by trystons_mommy at 12:52 AM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • I would be happy that they had such a great relationship. Their child doesn't suffer as much.
    Chrissy629

    Answer by Chrissy629 at 6:22 AM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • I imagine it is hard being in a relationship with a man who has a permanent relationship with another woman, but that is what it is. She is the mother of his child and if they get along well, that is a good thing. I talk to my ex about lots of things....but there is absolutely no way I want him back. We were together for a long time and we have a 20 year old and an 11 year old. I can't see limiting our interactions to only talk about the kids, but it's not like we have candle-lit dinners together either! If it is really small talk, then just try not to worry about it.
    BJoan

    Answer by BJoan at 9:03 AM on Apr. 28, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.