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Ok so I posted this question, then I thought about how it was worded so I am reposting it.
Ok so her is the thing. A while ago I was with this guy, then he cheated on me and hurt me so much that we broke up. Well down the line he got married. (to someone else) and I got married to. We didn’t talk for a long time, then a few days ago he Imed me. At first it was just small talk and then he started saying stuff. My original plan was to just mess around and make him jelious and see what he is missing. Then My feeling kinda came back as to how I felt about him, now I feel like crap cause I feel like I cheated on my DH and I don’t know what to do, Do I tell him or not. Please help me I am confused, and feel really bad. Below is the Ims from last night that his wife found. The IMs will be in the next two messages.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:29 PM on Apr. 28, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (19)
    ME -ya who said i was nice
    HIM- i did..... well i know you can be a bad way.
    ME- lol
    HIM- oh you know you can be a bad girl
    ME- yes yes i can'
    HIM if only i could take advantage of that
    HIM so i think you should come visit sometime soon..........very soon
    ME lol your funny
    HIM- why am i funny??
    ME- cause i said so
    ME- so here is a question, would you ever cheat on HER ( His wife)?
    HIM- with you maybe.
    HIM same question for you.
    ME- i pled the 5th
    ME- lol
    HIM no no no butt head
    ME- hahaha
    HIM- i anwsered so you have to anwser.
    ME- no i dont, who said i had to, lol
    HIM- i did!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:29 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • HIM- opps
    HIM-: there we go.
    ME- lol
    ME-: i dont know if i would or not, its hard to say with out being in the moment
    HIM- what a cop out.
    ME- what?
    Him-: butt head
    ME- what that was my honest answer
    ME- i really dont know unless i was in your arms if i would or not
    HIM well try to put yourself in that moment
    ME i dont know
    HIM imagine that im holding you tight and kissing your neck
    ME- oh crap that is NOT nice at all!!!
    ME- i think it just got REALLY hot
    HIM- lol
    ME- in here
    HIM- hot and wet??
    HIM- would you rather us sitting facing each other holding hands and gazing into each others eyes.....
    ME- ya that would be nice too
    HIM- if i took my hand and placed it on your neck, tickling the back of your neck and your ear, as i lean in for a kiss from you.

    Ok thats where it ended PLease help

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:30 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • How would you feel if your husband did this?

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:31 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • They say telling your spouse only releases your guilt. End contact with the old flame & concentrate on spicing up your marriage.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:34 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • way i see it- it was only a conversation. and at least it was online and didnt go any further.
    i think you should talk to your hubby about it and let him know you didnt mean anything by it, that iwas just playful bander-intended to make him jealous and that it went too far and wont happen again. if you keep it from him and he finds out it will look alot worse than if you were to come forward about it.
    i know its hard to move on especialy when you dont have that closure, but you and him are both married and need to respect that. respect eachother and your SO.
    good luck sweety.

    Answer by trystons_mommy at 12:37 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • You didn't cheat but he only want's to get into your pants. I'd tell him to beat it, litterally.

    Answer by Chrissy629 at 12:37 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • I don't know if I would tell him what all was said. I think I would tell him that we were IM each other but that I have put a stop on it b/c you didn't want any hard feelings with anyone. You need to quit talking to him period unless you do want to cheat on your husband. Obviously it wouldn't bother him to cheat on his wife but you need to think about it. Do you love your husband and how hurt would he be if he knew you were talking to someone else like that. Your answers were ok until it started about getting hot and so forth. Until then you never did say anything and that just kind of lead it on. Good Luck and I hope things work out.

    Answer by momwifelove at 12:40 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • 2 Samuel 12:3

    Answer by 2mothershelpers at 12:41 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • I would definatly stop contacting this guy. You do not want to cause further problems and complications and I would also tell your husband. I personally would feel way too guilty and would want to tell him. What would happen if he found out down the road and you never told him? Just be honest with him at why you did it. Good Luck.. :)

    Answer by ktlyn79s at 12:41 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • This is not very becoming of a married woman. And it sounds very high-schoolish. If there is danger of your husband hearing about this from anyone else, then you better fess up as soon as possible. When you do, tell him you realize that you were being foolish and that you don't intend for it to ever happen again. That is assuming you want to remain married.

    Answer by NannyB. at 12:43 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

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