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What do you do when you tell your child over and over to do something and they don't do it. Also, how to get a child to do the right thing when you're not around?

Also, how to get a child to do the right thing when you're not around?


Asked by momofone779 at 2:22 PM on Apr. 28, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (5)
  • I try very, very hard to stop when I hear myself saying it over and over. They get used to the repetition and start to drown me out. I tell them once, tell them the consequence if they don't, and leave it at that.
    When you're not around- that harder. I tell them that good character is doing the right thing when no one else is watching, just because you know it's right in your heart. Then I give them little tests like asking them to pick up and then walking to the mailbox or out to water plants. When they do something good for someone or they do something good on their own, I praise them and tell them that that is good character. Don't get me wrong- we also spank and have punishments and all that, but I can see the wheels turning with the good character thing...

    Answer by pat7879 at 10:09 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • Well it depends on what it is. If its picking something up then you take them by the hand and make them do it or tell them its going in the trash. Make a big trash bag full of toys or whatever and hide it. Don't give in and do it for them. Take away their fun as well, no video games, computer or going outside. If they can't listen then they don't need to have fun either. As for doing the right thing when your not around you need to let them know you always know what is going on and a punishment will be waiting for them when you get back. Expect more of them and they will give you more.

    Answer by brailynsmama08 at 2:24 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • well theres not much you can do if your not therre.. you just have to trust them.. teach them right from wrong and drill into there heads.. i dont tell my boys somthing over and over if they dont do it after two times, then something will happen (toys taken away, go to bed early)..

    Answer by HottMamaRossx2 at 2:31 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • Tell them once. If they don't do it, then there is a consequence. There has to be a consequence every time - no excuses. I know it's hard, but it works so much better than repeating yourself. When you keep telling them the same thing over and over again they tune you out and they also believe you won't or can't do anything about it (other than gripe at them); they see you as powerless and they don't respect you if you don't enforce the rules. It's really hard to change the way you parent, so I suggest looking into some sort of parenting program that will give you guidelines and support. I have been really pleased with the love & Logic approach with my kids. It will take time and work to get them to a point where they will do the right thing when you aren't there; there isn't just something you can say once and they get it - they have to practice, so start with small things and work your way up to big things.

    Answer by TweenAndTwinMom at 2:34 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • I tell them once. If it doesn't get done, they go into the corner until they decide they want to do as they were told. (the oldest is 5)

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 4:46 PM on Apr. 28, 2009