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Does anyone miss the freedom days?

Don't get me wrong, I love my son to death and would do anything in the world but I have NO freedom and sometime (a lot of times) it makes me crazy. My husband goes out when he wants and does what he wants. But me on the other hand, I have to "make plans" to go out otherwise he will leave and I will be stuck home with our son. Before him I'd go out til all hours of the night (like my husband does now) and I cannot even go out for a drink or anything now. I HATE IT!!!!!! And what makes things worse is that all of my friends are guys and people that I have been friends with for a long time (before I met my husband) and if I was to go hang out I'd be accused of cheating on him. WTF?!?!? Anyone else feel like this?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:33 PM on Apr. 28, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (16)
  • I understand how you feel. But since I got divorced and my ex husband gets my son on the weekends (except I get him the last weekend) it definatly helps. As for your husband. He sounds like he should help more and give you a night out and him stay home so you can get a breather
    worriedmommy600

    Answer by worriedmommy600 at 9:37 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • That's not really fair that he does whatever he wants. He's as much of a parent as you are. I think you need to schedule some time for yourself. I mean, once you become a parent you can't really stay out all night long anymore, but you should still be able to go out and have fun.

    And WTF is with him not trusting you?
    Indygirl18

    Answer by Indygirl18 at 9:37 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • Why in the hell would your husband go with out you?? Sorry but I would say no you are not going out without me.
    Do you want to stay married than that has to change.
    gammie

    Answer by gammie at 9:38 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • I miss the days where you can just get up and go. Being a mom, of a 4 year old, there is NO getting up and going. It's getting up, getting dressed, getting him dressed, making sure he uses the potty before we go, stopping for potty breaks, etc. You get the idea.
    TheDiva320

    Answer by TheDiva320 at 9:40 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • I agree with the pp's. And don't blame your son for you not being able to go out. its your hubby that is causing that problem. Let him know it buggs you and YOU need time away too. Its hard being a parent and both need a break!
    CoreyLynn

    Answer by CoreyLynn at 9:40 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • Sometimes I miss those days BUT I love my son with my whole heart! I can't imagine my life without him.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:42 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • I have tried to change it. Last night he left at 8 pm and came home at 8:30 am TODAY. Then he left again at 4 when I did (had to fill out an app at a bar and he called my cousin up to go with me to watch our son b/c he couldn't keep him) and i had to stop at a buddy's shop to ask some questions and he told me that my husband had called looking for me (b/c we only have one cell phone) and when I got home he wasn't even home.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:43 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • I completely understand!!! I have 4 love em to death but with no help it can get overwhelming and stressful! I too have an unsupportive father(I don't make excuses for him but I think he's not fatherly, at least to my kids(his other baby mama has no complaints!). You should however remind him that he took a vow for better or for worse and that you need a break too! Honey we're both human with emotions and thoughts right!? Well I need to express them to you RIGHT now and for you to HEAR me. If you need a break and time to be yourself and hang out with your friends, don't you think I do too!? I cook, clean, and do most of the parenting so I need breaks to keep from going into overload!!! Lets alternate weekends(draw straws to see who goes first), and see if your mom(if she's good with kids) can keep the baby every 3rd week of the month and the 4th week do romantic dinners at home.
    ladyd6280

    Answer by ladyd6280 at 9:48 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • hes staying out ALL night and u don't know where he is? Thats wrong! He need to tell you whats going on in his head! U don't leave your wife and son home alone wondering where u are! you need to MAKE him tell u whats going on! did this just start happening or has it been a while?
    CoreyLynn

    Answer by CoreyLynn at 9:48 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

  • One of my favorite peices of advice on ways to enjoy being a mom was this....
    "One day, turn on Sex in the City reruns and let it consume you....bask in your youth when all you had to worry about was the guy of the moment and your plans for the weekend. Then remember that back then when you took your freedom for granted, all you really wanted to do was fall in love and have beautiful babies."
    :)
    jenellemarie

    Answer by jenellemarie at 9:49 PM on Apr. 28, 2009

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