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If you are single and bring someone home to meet the kids and it doesnt work out between the two of you, is it okay to still allow the gentleman in ur kids life when u are trying to move on?

 
mothershort9

Asked by mothershort9 at 12:18 PM on Apr. 29, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (12)
  • I'd agree with #1. If he was in your life since they were babies then yeah, its cool(as long as dad isn't involved like that and or is cool with it(ALL KIDS NEED A MALE ROLE MODEL!). If latter applies and he's a good male figure and you have a son that needs guidance let it be!!! Even girls need a supportive man in their life!!! They're your kids, sit them down and ask how they and what they think, base your decision on that but use your best judgement to make final decision!!! Make sure it will benefit everyone involved in the long run!!! Best wishes and good luck!!!
    ladyd6280

    Answer by ladyd6280 at 12:30 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • I personally wouldn't let an ex of mine keep in contact with my children if it wasn't their biological father. The only way I would budge if I have dated this man for such a long time and he practically raised my children, then yeah I would. But not if we dated for less than 5 years.

    cynprz

    Answer by cynprz at 12:19 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • Um no. If he is not the father then he needs to leave. WHy have them bond with someone whom your not interested in only to find someone later? Why keep him around your kids if you don't feel the same for him as he does for you. Its not fair to him or you and not the kids for sure. They should spend time with someone you want to marry or you feel your truly committed to.
    brailynsmama08

    Answer by brailynsmama08 at 12:20 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • I personally do not think you should allow your children to meet the guys you are dating, until you know it's actually going somewhere, it's not fair to them to have people in and out of thier lives. If you are trying to move on and you haven't been together too long, maybe it is best you cut all ties.
    Rachel24517

    Answer by Rachel24517 at 12:22 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • No.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:23 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • Was his a long term thing that didnt work out, by your wording, not. So my opinion is No, why have him around if you dont want to reconnect? what happens when he does move on to make a family of his own, I doubt his partner would be understanding. Unless this was a long term relationship. its better for the kids to just move on now before they get more attatched and dependant to loose him later. sooner the better...good luck

    Kerinmomof2

    Answer by Kerinmomof2 at 12:25 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • no cuz if you get married to another guy later i am sure it wont fly with him. it'll be harder to tell the kids they cant see someone they are to attached to him for so long. might be harder for u to move on too.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:27 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • I agree with cynprz, NO!!
    sexymommyrb

    Answer by sexymommyrb at 12:37 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • Let them know it's just a friendship and don't let them think it's more or they will get hurt. We all need friends. Some friends come and come friends go. All are good lessons for kids to learn
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:39 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • Well I have mixed feelings on this. My DH was married and was the only father figure his step son ever knew from about 3 years old. They dovirced when he was 7 year old and he continued to see the boy after the divorce for about 3 years when she got pregnant again and started flipping out on him. This is a little different since they were married, but it all depends on the situation. If it was a very long relationship and the kids were close with the person then maybe consider it, but probably not.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:44 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

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