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somethings wrong...

i have a 9 yr old daughter that all of a sudden is very introverted.she has always been shy but now i can tell something is bothering her.with my other girls it was easy but with this one she just doesnt budge.any suggestions on how i can get her to talk.???i dont know if it is school or home or what?

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raineydays377

Asked by raineydays377 at 1:34 PM on Apr. 29, 2009 in General Parenting

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Answers (7)
  • Just sit her down..don't ask her anything or force her, just say, if you ever need to talk about anything, I am here. I won't judge you or be angry or react...I will listen. Please don't shut me out. I love you and I care for you. Then you can hug her and drop it. She will talk if she feels comfy about it and not forced to.
    BradenIsMySon

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 1:39 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • Give her a journal. She obviously feels like this is something she needs to work out on her own, so let her. Give her a diary that locks and tell her to write in it whenever she wants and promise her not to ever read it. And then don't read it.

    I have never had this problem... my daughter is only 11 months, though. Good luck!
    Ati_13

    Answer by Ati_13 at 1:39 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • If she won't talk with you, perhaps she'd feel comfortable talking with an aunt or grandmother, a close family friend, or the school counselor. You could ask her teacher if she has noticed any bullying or so forth. Also, girls are maturing earlier than they used to, it could be that she is starting hormones. Perhaps a private talk with her pediatrician would be a good idea.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 1:54 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • ya she has a 24 yr old sister that she is very close with but i kind of think she has something to do with it...
    raineydays377

    Answer by raineydays377 at 1:57 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • Does she have a friend at school? Maybe your daughter will talk to her, or at least can draw her out. Have the friend over and let them make cookies in the kitchen while you lightly supervise. Maybe it will flow from her naturally, or at least take her mind off her worries for a little while.
    singnstitch

    Answer by singnstitch at 4:53 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • Don't bug her about it. Take her out for the day just some Mother/Daughter time and see if she opens up with out you brining it up. On the drive home if she is quiet ask her whats she's thinking about, or tell her I've noticed a change in you is everything ok? 


    My cousin got this way and it was bc she had started her period at 9!! And she was scared she din't know what was going on bc she hadn't had the sex talk with her mom... i girl in class told her that she was dying because she was bleeding...


    - http://www.ramblingsofasahm.com/

    Vanessannd

    Answer by Vanessannd at 5:11 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • Have you tried encouraging her to draw or write?

    My daughter's very introverted at times but she's also very artistic and I find I can suss out what's up with her by looking at her her drawings or even asking her to draw how she's feeling.

    If that doesn't work then seriously consider councilling perhaps? Child councillors are experts in getting children to relax and open up.
    TabathaM

    Answer by TabathaM at 6:52 PM on Apr. 30, 2009

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