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What should I do?????

my 9 year old step son stole $2.oo from one of my family members what can i do to make him understand thats wrong and he should never do it again

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:29 PM on Apr. 29, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

Answers (10)
  • Make him do chores to pay it back.
    BrandonsMom1000

    Answer by BrandonsMom1000 at 4:30 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • Hows about making him return it?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:32 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • he already knows its wrong but remind him and make him do chores or chorse for what ever family member. and dont make it to easy let him see paying back stinks. like dishes 15 cents, clean out the fridge 20 cents, if u make it easy they dont learn. my dd did the samething but it was 10.00 ( i had put aside for the state park/lake fee to bring the kids ) needless to say she helped stack wood and cleaned everything and did laundry she learned her lesson its been a year so so far so good. i know its a hard age but they still have to learn the concequences.
    tabbys4

    Answer by tabbys4 at 4:36 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • At nine years old, he is not too old to spank. I would dust his britches, then make him personally give back the money and apologize profusely to that person. Before I busted him, I would give him a good talking-to about what stealing is, and why it is wrong. I would also tell him how disappointed in him I was. Children normally can't stand it if they know they have hurt their parents in any way. Hopefully, some of this will hit home.
    singnstitch

    Answer by singnstitch at 4:43 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • Make him return it and apologize. I would NOT spank him as singnstitch said, the punishment doesn't fit the crime and spankings don't solve everything. Sit down and talk to him about why stealing is so wrong. He is old enough to talk to, reason with and understand. If possible, have him do some chores for the person he stole from. You can also have the person he stole from talk to him and express their disappointment. I would NOT say he is a bad kid in anyway. He isn't, just his choice was.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 9:23 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • Make him return the money and apologize first. Talk with him and ask him why he stole the money and what he wanted it for. Remind him of the consequences that can happen if he continues to do this type of thing, then tell him if he needs money he has to earn it the old fashioned way by working for it, I would let the relative he stole from give him a small chore list to do. Then assign him a weekly chore list to earn a few dollars for himself. My daughters wanted cell phones and I am against it because I didn't think they would take care of them. They saved their own money from allowance, birthdays, Christmas and bought their own, They buy there own minutes too. It gives them pride that they bought their own and not their parents. They appreciate it more.
    CasualCandles

    Answer by CasualCandles at 9:49 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • If he already spent it, he'll have to earn it to pay it back. No matter what, make him tell the person about it. We do a two-part apology in my house. First, why did you do it...then, why you're not going to do it again. ex. "I'm sorry I stole money from you. I wanted to buy some candy. I know it was wrong and I'm not going to do it again because I know this lowered your trust in me." By allowing your child to state why they did something, they feel like they get their turn to explain themselves.
    sparrowprincess

    Answer by sparrowprincess at 11:19 PM on Apr. 29, 2009

  • I"m sorry You should do nothing. As a step mother You should let the parents do the disciplining, just let him no that behavior is wrong.
    itmomnotmeaw

    Answer by itmomnotmeaw at 12:10 AM on Apr. 30, 2009

  • What are your family circumstances? Who does he live with? What was the reason that he stole the money?
    He needs to know that stealing is wrong and to be made to understand the seriousness of his actions. However, punishment may not be appropriate. You really do need to know what was behind it. Was it just a moment of weakness - the $2 was there, so he picked it up; was it spitefullness; was he trying to make it seem that a step-sibling was to blame.
    Children do these things for many different reasons, which are not always the most obvious reasons either.
    Also, you are his step-mother. If you are in sole charge of him, with his father, (some or all the time) then it is your joint job to deal with this. If he lives with his mother normally, it is her job, along with his father. Either way, unless perhaps this was just a one-off slip-up, you should act jointly with his dad.
    I do not think "spanking" is ever appropriate
    LizzieMade

    Answer by LizzieMade at 5:21 AM on Apr. 30, 2009

  • itmomnotmeaw
    " I"m sorry You should do nothing. As a step mother You should let the parents do the disciplining, just let him no that behavior is wrong. "

    That is a bunch of BS! As a step mother my a**. A Step mother or father is a parent as well and should be treated as such. Allowing children to just walk all over step parents is the most retarded thing i have ever heard of. A step mother is a parent!

    This mindset just irritates me beyond belief. Obviously this SM cares greatly for her SKs and is trying to do what is best for them. she didn't ask you if about her parental rights. i would assume that if she is asking about disciplining, the child's natural father and mother are okay with her participating in the raising of their children (I wouldn't be with someone who didn't trust me to raise their kids!). You know nothing about this woman's situation.

    i agree with paying it back by the way - & grounding.
    aly38914290

    Answer by aly38914290 at 11:15 PM on Apr. 30, 2009

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