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Somebody please tell me this is normal!?!

I caught my three yr old daughter masturbating! I walked into wake her from her nap and she was humping her blanky. This isnt the first time I caught her but the first time I really did not think anything of it. I have tried to talk to her about what is appropriate and whats not but she is only three.

I was wondering if it is normal for a three yr old girl to be doing this especially at such a young age? Or this is something I should not be worried about?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:14 PM on Apr. 30, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (7)
  • im not really sure you should talk to her about it my daughter is 3 and hasnt dont that she touches it every now and then but nothing like that. i had a friend that went threw this with her daughter she was a little older i think 4 or 5 and the doc just told her that its something that they discover and are curious about, a new sensation, and to just talk to her about it let her know the difference between right and wrong. sorry i dont know if this helps at all.

    Answer by jac1908 at 9:20 PM on Apr. 30, 2009

  • I wouldn't make a big deal out of it. Lots of kids do that. If she starts doing it outside of her bedroom, just tell her that is something she can only do in private. But for now, I'd just let it go.

    Answer by robinann5 at 9:51 PM on Apr. 30, 2009

  • when i worked in a daycare their were 4 yr. old twins that would sometimes do this during nap time. we made efforts to keep them from doing this while at the daycare. however, i wouldn't be worried. the head teacher in the room (i was an assistant and had little experience in this area) said this was normal in this age group. just explain that it is something to do in private if she is doing it in public. you could also bring it up to her doctor.

    Answer by aly38914290 at 11:22 PM on Apr. 30, 2009

  • This is VERY normal. Simply gently teach her that this is something she should do in private (like in her bedroom) and she should wash her hands after - just like she does when she goes peepee.

    Answer by kaycee14 at 12:04 AM on May. 1, 2009

  • It's completely normal, and most people will tell you not to try to suppress it, just make sure she knows when and where it's ok to do. I like the pp's added advice to tell her she needs to wash her hands afterward.

    Answer by motherofanaries at 10:11 AM on May. 1, 2009

  • That is completely normal. A 3 y/o is still completely in awe with and discovering thier body. Sometimes, my 3 y/o touches himself, and I just tell him that is not something you do in front of others, it's private. For LO's it's not sexual, just a pleasant sensation. I would not worry or make a big deal about it. I would keep any conversation about it short & to the point (definitely mention washing hands, same way as when she has used the potty). Masturbating is a much bigger deal to adults than it is to preschoolers :)


    Answer by BubbaLuva at 11:48 AM on May. 1, 2009

  • If you watched Oprah and her sex show for teenage girls, you would have heard it's very normal. The therapist said to tell girls, "it's very normal and pleasure is part of who we are. We shouldn't be ashamed of it."

    Of course I'm not going to tell my 4 year old that who is on the couch with her hands down her pants and says, "it feels good."

    I told her, "Honey, I know it feels good and that's ok. But the right place for that behavior is not on the couch or in front of other people. It's in the bedroom."

    Answer by lynnard at 11:00 PM on May. 3, 2009

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